Why is it the nicest of guys I'm not attracted to?

So he's sweet, always texts me first. Always shares things with me. Pays for dates, doesn't ever ask me to. We haven't been on first date but from his picture I don't find him as attractive as guys I've been with.

I know its not all about looks as he has a great personality but I'm not finding him very attractive. He is fun and different to every guy I've ever met. We are opposites in some ways but we have our similiarities.

He is boyfriend material, but for some reason I'm not excited about him. I don't know if it will come when we first meet, but I'm not like feeling butterflies or anything.

But I guess the spark will only be there in person right? He seems like a real gent and he respects women as he has sisters and stuff. His longest gf was of 3 years so I can tell he's not like the toerags I've met.

Other guys I've met are good looking but treated me really badly, so I know looks are not everything but I got to be at least a bit attracted to him right?

Also I've been out with players, cheats, liars. I've went for looks, I'm not shallow but I'm not experienced with men. Had my first bf at 19 and he was not attractive but after that I went for guys who people would say are a solid 9.

They messed my head up, tried controlling me and emotionally drained me. I wouldn't want an overly attractive guy, but what if I can't get chemistry or connection with a nice guy that isn't that physically good looking. Am I doomed?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Study shows that women are attracted to those men who are dominant on her, witty, who make feel women submissive on bed, and who have ability to hold conversations for long is an attractive guy for a women.
    It also includes 70% of ignorance ( which makes her curious and think) to her in which it stunningly holds the attention of woman towards him. This makes women chase.
    Bad guys have all these abilities above while nice guys come as easy to women. Hence they don't attract too much.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I had a similar problem. I'm not sure if it'll apply to you but I had a big fear of engulfment. When hit with someone that seemed like she would give me everything, I felt like I may end up feeling obligated to stay because I'd have no legitimate reason to leave. Why? Because they were so nice and I didn't want to hurt them. But I just had to accept that when dating sometimes we hurt people and sometimes we get hurt but eventually we all get over it.

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  • If your not attracted when you meet him, just be honest to him about it. If your not attracted to each other it will never work out regardless of anything else.

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  • Well, don' miss your chance :D

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