What is wrong with me, how can I fix this?

I'm 19, I am very active, I work out do cheerleading, play basketball rugby and soccer, I volunteer in my community and have always had it easy when it came to getting high marks. I have good friends. Everything is order in my life except for one thing, I have never had a boyfriend. I don't know what it is about me but I've just never been able to date. I don't know what I do to scare them away. I will talk to guys for a week or two and they'll seem interested then they just stop talking, it seems like guys just want to hook up with me but they never want to date. I don't know how to get a relationship at this point I just want a boyfriend but it's impossible it frustrates me that it's easy for everyone but me I feel like it shouldn't have taken me this long I'm pissed.

Updates:
Also a lot of guys ask to hook up but not date, do guys just want to hook up with ugly girls and date hot ones?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sadly, your update actually does say a lot for men these days. Though with this, I can say that there are men out there that are willing to date you. You just need to find a place to where such men exist.
    Usually undatable girls are undatable, because of themselves, and usually not every outside source. Should it either be a personality trait that is just hard to deal with, or possibly just the idea that you aren't really putting yourself on the line.
    Dating isn't just a game, nor is it something that can just be done half assed. If you want something, then you must go get it. I've dated some incredibly beautiful women in the past, and honestly (mind my own ego.). They both approached me, and even though we didn't work out. I had honest to good relationships with most of them. Try putting yourself out there, and see what you get. Plus, guys around your age just want sex, and it may be difficult for a while to find the right guy.

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    • All of my friends have constantly had a string of boyfriends one of my friends has only had a week of from being in a relationship, I don't get why it's so hard for me to find someone

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    • True, I just have a hard time because I'm not use to talking to guys or dating

    • It takes practice, and understanding to do so. Keep this anology in mind for attempting to put yourself out there. "You can never miss half of the shots that you never take.".

What Guys Said 6

  • Guys are mostly looking for relationships involving sex, not waiting an age and a half for you to become sexually interested. Guess what? Relationships are about sex. Usually people have sex now before they get into relationships. You seem to have the reverse idea in your mind--that you should be in a relationship forever and ever and ever and ever before doing anything remotely sexual. It's easy for other people because they're willing to have sex, and then move into a relationship. When guys put in all this effort and then get absolutely nothing out of it, except for your low valued platonic friendship, then they will simply stop talking to you. It has nothing to do with hotness and ugliness, although it can be a factor.

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  • Maybe they think you're out of their league.

    Dirt bags will always be dirt bags that ask for sex. It has nothing to do with your looks. Want real truth? Show a pic of yourself and the guys here will tell you.

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    • Thank you :) I think that all guys are out of my league though.

    • You're in the right league, I'd say.

    • Thank you, I was nervous about putting myself as my dp because I was afraid I'd get called fat and ugly but that made my night a lot better

  • You seem to be into a lot of stuff. How often do you give people the "I'm sorry but I'm busy that day" turn down?

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    • I usually schedule pretty efficiently so if I want the guy who asked for a day I can usually fit him in or if not I always offer another day, but I use it if I don't really like the guy

  • You are very pretty! Finding a good guy is hard and takes time so it's normal what's happening to you. I'm a good guy but I'm chubby so women would never date me, the next one maybe is too shy, taken, busy etc etc you just have to wait it out and NEVER and I mean never settle!!!

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    • Aweee thank you! I'm sure there is a very special girl for you :)

    • There's not but I've learned to accept if. In your case though there is but you have to weed out the thousands of guys who only want you for your hot body. Good luck!

  • same problem with me also i also never had girlfrind soo be patient u will find a good and nice guy soon

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  • most guys will hook up with anything they can get.

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What Girls Said 1

  • DON'T SAY you're ugly!! No one is ugly, you can't be everyone's type, but I really don't think there's such a thing like a ugly girl/guy. There's someone for everyone!. Look I know how you feel, I know that feeling perfectly. I'm 28yrs old and I have only been in 2 serious relationships, in one of them I broke up with the guy because he was being mean to me, in the other one the guy was even going to marry me but decided not to and just walked away.
    Most recently I went out with a guy ten years older than me, he was my crush and is my neighbor, I thought he was very nice and he was really into me, by the way he acted, but after our second date in which he kissed me, and I guess he got away with what he wanted, he walked away and is now dating someone else. I really wasn't expecting this from him since he looked more mature but I guess age is just a number.
    Why am I telling you about this? Well for you to see you are not the only one going through this, I also get VERY depressed and desperate/frustate sometimes, because yes A lot of guys have shown interest on me, and ask for my number but they never call or ask me out. And like you everyone says about me that I'm a good girl, that helps others, I workout, and people say I'm pretty. So sometimes I wonder "what the heck is wrong with me? Am I an alien? everyone's seems worth it but me?" But you know what? then after crying, thinking a lot, I force myself to go out and forget about it, find reasons why I LOVE myself and my family, the people who loves me back!. And just with time I get better. YES IT HURTS! but it's not up to us to change it. But I'm sure there will be a guy sooner or later that will come to your life who will notice what others didn't and you know why they didn't? because you are way too good for them, they don't deserve you!. Look for a quote called: Girls are like apples. It will help you a lot! Smile! :)

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