Please help, I don't know what to do and it's killing me?

I don't easily like guys. And by that I mean that it's really hard for me to like someone. They could be similar to be so many ways, and be a great person but if I don't like them, I don't like them. I've only liked one guy, but things didn't end quite well.

II've always been such a safe person, because my parents are very religious and I know that if I date someone, chances are they will see me on a date with them or my parent's religious buddies (which are many) will see it and tell my parents. Besides, I barely have time for hanging out with people. I work on weekends and I'm on my last year of high school so I'm always busy!

I've recently met this guy and I like him so much. So much, that for the first time in my life I'm actually considering just forgetting about it all and just dating him. But I know it doesn't work like that.

I don't know what to so! :( I'm so upset! I just want to be with him but I literally don't have time for anything nowadays and that might be a problem that'll arise in the relationship, and whenever we go out I'll forever be worried that someone might see us and it'll all be over. My parents are seriously religious and if I date someone who isn't from church, I will probably never go out with my friends again ever.

Please, somebody help me out. I didn't want to post this here but this is my last desperate act.

Updates:
Thank you SO MUCH for answering guys ♡

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like the only reason you are feeling hurt is because your holding yourself back. Maby it is wise to just experience it for a change. Isn't love a big part of religion?

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    • I completely agree, it is. I'm tired of having to say no to the things I actually want and do what's the morally 'right' things to do. Yeah, it is. But my parents just assume that EVERYBODY who doesn't goes to our church is a bad person.

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    • Its a hard choice i know. For me personally i would choose to experience life as i want within reason ofcourse. If they keep holding you back you can't become who you want/need to be.

    • Yeah, I know. Thank you SO much for your help!

What Guys Said 1

  • Next year, when you're off at college, your parents will have no say in whether you can go out with your friends.

    Date him.

    If anyone gives you any lip, tell 'em you spoke with the pastor about a message you received from God in a dream that encouraged you to reach out to people who weren't part of the fold.

    Then tell 'em you're out to convert the poor soul.

    As for not having enough time... well, you'll have to squeeze him in somewhere!

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What Girls Said 1

  • That sounds tough...to choose. But you need to figure if risking all this is worth dating the guy. In such a case frankly I would make a pro-con list.
    Also, if you are scared of getting seen by someone with a guy then you should talk this out with him (but this is only when you actually decide to date him). He might understand your problem and you two could figure a way out.

    But my question is, do you really want to live your life scared like this? Because even if you let this guy go, what about the next one and the next? You can't keep going on like this, at least according to me. You are an adult you can choose whom you want to date :)

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    • I completely understand you. Thank you so much for answering! I've always hated living like this because I never experience life to the fullest, always afraid that it might seem wrong on someone's eyes and I don't want to live this way but I feel like I'm cornered and I've got no choice. Like, my parents are the kind of parents that you'd rather kick me out than have their rules broken.

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    • Then in that case, live your life on your terms (but be safe too). If your parents can't handle it, then too bad. You can't always live like someone who is afraid of trying new things. It will ruin your life and you will miss out on a lot of things!

    • You're right. Thank you for your help! ♡

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