So I met this girl when hanging out with a few friends. I think I might be interested in her. She seems cool and stuff and is cute too. But the only thing is her health issues. She has a heart problem and already has a pacemaker and we're only in our early 20's. She has a learning disorder (which I didn't even knowand couldn't tell until she told us).
The thing is that I look forward and picture the future. I'm not interested in dating a girl just to date or for sex reasons. I wanna date a girl that I see a potential of getting married to one day and having a family together. With this girl, I'm kinda scared that she'll either pass on her learning disorder to our kids if it's genetic and I don't wanna marry her and have kids and then see her die like maybe 5-10 years into our marriage. I don't want our kids to be motherless. Sure I can remarry but that's not the point and not what I wanna think about. What you think? Should I go for it? Am I being selfish? My friend sqaid it kind of is because if we could work out, then I'm denying a girl's opportunity to be a mother simply because of her medical conditions.
- Go for itVote A
- don't go for itVote B
Most Helpful Girl
I think it's harsh to set someone up for a loss before anything has even begun but I understand your reasoning and doubts. Even though it is long term thinking I respect your doubts because I think I would be the same. Our whole evolution has been built on survival of the fittest and natural selection. We are programmed to find a suitable mate. I believe that everyone should be able to find love and have a family but I would also be concerned about health issues and possibly passing on conditions. That maybe something she can't help as it may have been passed on. It doesn't change her as a person. Things could work out and with all the medicine and technology around she may even outlive you. I think it comes down to how much you like her. I personally worry about things like this as well, it's not judgmental it's just that I worry too much and would like a happy healthy family one day. You can't fight for your feelings for too long, if you like her then you like her, see where it goes. It may be more meaningful then other relationships because of those reasons. Goodluck.0