I meet my dream girl at bar last night and got no where with her now disappointed?

there is this country bar I occasionally go to some Saturdays , last night I saw this girl and she was all that , good looking , fun , nice personality and I totally had the hot's for her. I mean a lot of girls go to this bar its very popular so its not like she was only girl I saw that night but I just had to have her and after she was done dancing with gf I immediately asked her is she wanted to go get a drink with me and got no where with her at all. she didn't even ask for my name , she wasn't rude in the sense but maybe didn't know me enough to be interested. I don't know what else to say I wanted this girl so bad why couldn't she had just say yes and we could of got to know each other that night instead.

anyways do you think I asked her too soon for a drink? should I have talked to her for longer first? was it a bad idea to ask drink all together? it seems odd to me that a girl who did not have a drink at that time would turn down a free drink even if she didn't like me


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Personally, I think your approach was rather rudimentary. Approaching a woman and asking to buy her drink is a cliché pickup line which suggests that a guy is attempting to win a woman over by buying her a drink or, as in many cases, trying to take her home.

    Not good, my friend. Not good. For if she is all that as you've described, she is regularly hit on by guys who use that same line, that same approach and, as a result, her antennas may have told her you are no different from most guys who want in.

    Why did you not ask her to dance? Why did you not introduce yourself to her to strike up a conversation?

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    • I don't know I'm really not that good at dancing , last time an attractive girl wanted to dance with me there I sort of made a fool of myself when we actually did dance. I was hoping to talk to her at bar when we would of been getting drinks but things didn't go that way

    • Understood. But you don't have to be a good dancer, necessarily, to dance with a girl. Next time, stay away from cliché pickup lines and, if at all possible, refrain from buying women drinks to interact with them at bars. If they are interested, it will not matter if you offer to buy a drink or not.

What Girls Said 4

  • I would never take a drink off of a guy that I hadn't been speaking to for a while first, even if he was outstandingly attractive, I would still hesitate. I think you need to strike up some conversation first to determine if you're intellectually compatible- and if you're already having a witty conversation, it probably means she already thinks you're attractive enough to be talking to - magic combo!

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  • maybe if you met her in a different place, things wouldve been differently. I think in bars, a lot of guys hit on girls. At least that's what I've heard and usually the girls just want to hang out with their girl friends. And if I were her, I wouldn't accept the drink either. Not because of you, but because you never know, like maybe the stranger has other things in mind

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  • Don't let it get u down I would never take a drink from a guy I don't know maybe I am too over cautious I would say talk to her longer or maybe she had a good reason not to

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  • no, I don't think you did anything wrong at all. I think, if anything, she would have been impressed by your confidence and directness. There are soo many reasons why she may not have been able to say yes.. try not to let it get you down :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • Maybe a bit too strong. You should have just told her you really like her and you would really enjoy getting to know her better and simply asked for her number. Some times people go out to have a good time with no intention of finding anyone. She may not be single anyway. Maybe she is married even. Who knows. All you can do is hope she goes back some time and try again.

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    • I know but I just meet her , wouldn't it be weird to say I already like her when I don't even know her? I just though I should try to get her attention and see if it went anywhere

    • Yes, I totally know where you are coming from. I have experienced this. Never got her. But one thing is for sure, if you over do it, she'll think something is seriously wrong with you, LOL! Good luck, I hope you get a second chance.

  • If you cold approach girls, expect lots of failure. What are the odds everything lines up perfectly and she likes you? It's not worth a GAG question. There will be 1000s more before you get the perfect girl.

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  • Were any other attempts made to get to know her? Did you ever ask for her name? And the conversation could have flowed from there then you could have asked her to have a drink with you or asked her to dance (if they have a dance floor).

    If you act interested in her first then there's a good chance she'll take you up on that drink offer.

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    • it all happened so quick so I guess no , I should of talked to her a bit more but find place is loud so its hard to hear anyways felt trying to get her to bar for drink was best bet at time. some people also have a hard time hearing my voice for some reason so likely hard to have a convo if its loud

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