I've been with my fiancé two years. He told me his mom is the only person in the world who he has.?

longest adult relationship. he has been to prison 3 times. defensive all the time. says he loves me but i feel like I'm walking on egg shells.been cheated on in past. this will be 2nd marriage.both have sons from past relationships


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Do you really want to spend the rest of your life, I mean every day in your own home, feeling like you have to walk on eggshells? If that isn't what you want then maybe a close, long -term friendship may be better for everybody? You will be no good to him even as a simple friend if you are not happy.

    Has he really, honestly, openly dealt with every bad thing he's done? If yes then why is he so defensive all of the time? Is he receiving any sort of counselling?

    What other positive influences does he have in his life? Sporting groups, friends, constructive employment? There are a number of things required to get somebody's life back together, and yes close relationships are a major part but you cannot be everything to him, it's simply not possible. He needs all of these other things in his life too.

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    • I always tell him he needs counseling and he tells me his life made him the way he is. He feels like no one will ever truly be there for him do to past relationships and his father. I have done everything to show him I'm not gong anywhere though. yes he works 40 hour job plus side jobs. Also he has friends most of which are still doing the things he used to do before me. I don't want to be everything but I do feel like at this point I should get more credit. I;m been here since the weekend he got out and had nothing up until now and never ask for anything

What Guys Said 5

  • People can change, you're right. There's a catch however. When people like your fiance change, they tend to do so dramatically. In other words, he's made a sincere and whole-hearted commitment to put his life back together. If he hasn't assumed responsibility and atoned for everything (and I mean everything) he's done that has hurt people in the past, he is someone you should reconsider marrying.

    Yes, he's clearly a human being with his own emotions and hardships. That doesn't necessarily make him a quality life partner.

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    • hmm thats something to think about

  • This one doesn't sound like a winner to me. You need to trust your feelings on him. God gave us feelings for a reason. Be careful.

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    • do you think time will help with trust. or is it me that he doesn't want?

    • It's been two years. I would find a graceful way to get out. I can't get into his head, but I don't like the 'eggshells' part, that's not healthy for you. You need the opposite of 'eggshells'.

    • thank you

  • Sounds like a disaster just waiting to happen.

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  • ask yourself if you think he's truly changed his ways or if you're just trying to see him in a good light, if you answered the latter, you probably shouldn't be marrying

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  • Yeah he's too sketchy to be a reliable partner. You're better off with someone with a much more stable life plan.

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    • do you believe people change though? I believe everyone has a past and try not to judge people because of it.. but maybe thats my problem?

    • "Yeah he's too sketchy to be a reliable partner. You're better off with someone with a much more stable life plan."

      Check.

What Girls Said 2

  • He doesn't sound like my first choice nor my second or third. Seriously hope you know what you are doing. Personally I would leave and never look back.

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    • i love him and… what about the kids?

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    • Feel like I'm walking on egg shells.been cheated on in the past. Either way assuming you have children they need you to get you and them out. You truly need to find someone who will teach you what love really is.

    • i meant in a previous relationship. but i here you loud and clear i believe i have a warped view of what it is , thanks for the advice

  • Eh, sounds like he doesn't think you have his back 100%.

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    • yeah i know but….. do you think that is temp or perm?

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