Guys would you mind a girl who was a bit of a loner?

I'm super quiet, super shy and super unsociable sometimes lol. I don't mind being that way, I like my own company a lot and being more around my family and 2 close guy friends.

Would that strike you as odd or off putting? I don't put myself out there for dating or anything so I don't expect guys to notice or approach me for those reasons but are bubbly sociable women naturally more appealing? :)

Thank you so much for all answers! :)


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Perfectly fine with me, since leaving my ex I'm all alone in the town I'm living, just met a girl at the gym a few days ago that I train with which is nice and u have one other friend that I run with at night most days, apart from that I'm literally on my own 24/7.
    Id like to make more friends but I'm more of a one to one guy I'm not really into hanging in groups anymore.
    So yea kinda random but if I met a girl that told me she's a bit of a loner is be secretly overjoyed, every girl I knows wants to go out and get drunk most nights and I don't like it so there's more chance loner girls are the same lol.

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    • My ex sounds a lot like how you are :) I like who I am and everything but it is hard to meet people, especially if you don't have a massive sociable group and don't want to get trolleyed all the time lol. By the way do you live up North or down South? :) You look like a Northern guy for some reason lol.

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    • Aww miss ;) please call me Amy :) I hope your night shift goes quickly, here you can have the rest of my chips to keep you occupied ;) and I'll do that thank you, it was nice :)

What Guys Said 20

  • It would only be a turn off if I tried to talk to her and she was full of one-word answers. I tried going to lunch with a girl who was super quiet and getting her to talk was like pulling teeth and I was extremely turned off.

    But if you're just a girl with a small amount of friends it is perfectly sensible.

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    • That's understandable :) I'm ok once I feel comfortable and secure with somebody, just extremely quiet at the offset :)

  • nothing wrong with being that person. its the best thing when a person is most comfortable with themself. plus there has to be a balance in the world

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  • I think you make the right choices, it's okay to be loner, shy, unsociable
    a guy should never make a girl change to please him, as long as there
    is love between the two , it's okay to have male friends, family is big
    part of your life so why not, i wish my family was close their not
    i've always been laid back, quiet, very sensitive, shy, I'm afraid to be
    a burden on a girl

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  • Not at all. It's better than a really needy and clingy chick by far.

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  • Throughout my entire life, I've approached quiet, shy girls with intentions of forming a relationship with them, while every girl that was sociable and talkative that I approached my intentions were simply to have sex with them. My most recent crush was pretty shy and that's initially what caused the attraction.

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    • Do you mind that a shy girl might not always approach you first, or that she would be a bit reserved on you approaching her to begin with? :) I worry that I come off too quiet and therefore end up deterring guys who I do actually like very much.

    • Well from my experience women in general don't tend to approach first and shy girls significantly less so I' already take that into consideration when making an approach. It's important to show at least some interest in the guy in terms of maybe smiling/laughing at his corny jokes. It depends on the guy too, sometimes a shy girl just needs a guy that can ease the awkwardness by being good at conversations in order to make her open up and be herself.

    • You seem very understanding! :) and yeah I find I sometimes need the conversational boost from a man to feel secure about conversing with him. I'm not very good at initiating things which I'm sure can be annoying for some guys. They need to have some pointers as to whether they should approach or not :)

  • If one day I would meet a girl with a very strong character and who was very communicative, she would probably dominate me. I'm a bit shy, just like you :-)
    So to me, it would be attractive instead of turning me off!

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  • Wouldn't mind it aslong as she is not the type to cling to one person and expect them to do the same. For example, she has few friends, we get into a relationship and suddenly im her entire social life. That's a nono

    Also, even though she is a loner/shy/quiet, id expect to still be able to talk to her whenever without getting one liners

    Apart from that, being shy is actually an attractive quality I think. Shy girls are usually kind and caring

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  • I don't mind em in fact I like em a tad more.

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  • If you're more shy you're less likely to find guys who want to approach you as it is but otherwise it's no biggie.

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    • Yeah that can be a problem but I don't mind that that's the case, I don't expect a man to go out of his way to approach me over a woman who is showing more signs of interest :)

  • That would not bother me at all. Girls like that are usually very smart and sweet.

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  • i´d go for a loner since i am kind of a loner too :)

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  • I actually prefer a girl who's more shy and reserved and has only a few friends.

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    • Hi :) thanks for answering. Can I ask why you prefer quieter girls? :)

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    • I just don't like the party type girls

    • Yeah I don't have much in common with party type girls either lol

  • i do find social women more appealing but thats only if we share common interests

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  • that sounds like a benefit to your personality IMHO

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  • I wouldn't mind at all :)

    I think with girls that are that way there's less jealousy… You don't have to worry that she goes to a party and meets someone else, and I know you have to trust your partner but if she is a 10 and I'm a 5-7, she could easily find someone better than me.

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  • I never saw one among girls
    I believe girls are pretty good at not being loners

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  • I do not mind at all, to be honest I've been a loner most of the time myself :)

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  • Bubbly sociable women naturally more appealing, because they make the guy feel wanted. If you feel uncomfortable around a guy, then he is going to pick up the vibe that you don't want him around. Once you get to know someone and feel comfortable around them, that might change, but it makes meeting new people really hard.

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    • It is very hard :/ but it's not in my nature to be very open and bubbly so I guess you just have to muddle along as best you can :)

    • That is the problem with being shy or introverted. It is always hard to meet new people.

  • Girls like that are the most genuine. So yes, I would.

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    • Really? That's a sweet thing to say :)

    • I'm introverted. I feel like she would understand me more than an outgoing woman would.

  • I am not into dating or looking for a girl anymore so I am just making a general comment.

    There is nothing wrong with being a loner. Being a loner has nothing to do with your nature being sweet or pleasant or otherwise. I will just advise you this. If you settle down one day, make sure because of your nature, you do not tie your partner down at home. If he is of the nature who likes to go out a lot. It will be very difficult.

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    • Hi :) Thanks for your answer. I wouldn't ever tie a guy down, I'm independant in what I like to do so I wouldn't cling or anything like that. I would most probably feel secure with a man who was like me with regards to being quiet or unsociable though :)

What Girls Said 6

  • welcome to the club - I do not even have 2 guy friends - I just have my family and my books lol but I do not think that being shy and reserved is a problem - in all honesty I think it says a lot about girls like us "that we are very intelligent" lol but we are...

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    • I would hope it says that about us lol I love books! Total escapism :)

    • I know right - I love Sherrilyn Kenyon books

  • I'm just like you haha

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  • im the same way haha

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  • I'm the same as you :)

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  • Most guys on here say they would prefer a loner girl. But i think in "real life" its a bit different. As a loner (shy, unsociable, etc.) you seem very unapproachable, people rarely wanna talk to you.

    Guys our age definitely like the extroverted chicks more. I am a loner too and it really sucks when it comes to guys.

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    • Yeah I find it becomes increasingly difficult to attract attention when you're so shy :/

  • I'm the same as you, but I think a guy isn't going to be too thrilled about your only friends being guys. Gotta have girl friends. Not just for a guy but for yourself

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    • I was bullied through high school and college by the same group of girls so I naturally feel more relaxed with my guy friends but I would understand that would be a problem :) I have a twin sister so she's like my best girl friend :)

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