This guy that I've been casually seeing for the past 2 years and I have had a very intense and tumultuous relationship. It's off and on but never exclusive. We fight and stop talking and then can't stay away for too long. He's always pushing me away and recently we got into a conversation about "us" and I called him out on something and he was surprised and I said "I know you by now" and he said "you weren't friends with me when I was in combat." And I don't even know what to say to that. It feels like another excuse to push me away. I know that's a real feeling that military guys have when they've been in combat but what do you think he meant by that? Why did he say that?
He said I was friends with him when he was in combat?
What Guys Said 1
He probably did some things he's not proud of that you wouldn't think him capable of.0
What Girls Said 1
So you should probably just tell him all your concerns. Present them in a way that is neutral so that you guys won't have an argument and just tell him that no matter what he did you will be there for him. Or the other option give him time to heal from what ever happened in combat because he might have lost a close friend or someone he had become close with in the time he was in for. Either way just present the options on neutral ground and try to avoid using confrontational/antagonist phrases because that just makes him feel trapped and cornered and he will lash out to escape that feeling.0
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