should i go for it or no? girls opinions?

I have know this girl and we were in the same class but we were not really friends just a colleague. When I was in grade 6 i moved to another country and we haven't seen each other for ten years. when i made a Facebook account i started adding old friends. I didn't add her but she added me 2 years ago. since she added me i should have started the convo right? well i didn't coz I had many things going in my life and i was expecting her to start the conversation. 2 years and we haven't talked. to be honest she caught my attention recently i started to be attracted to her for no reason. how do I start a very casual conversation with her without coming off as desperate. she might have interest in me since she always sends me a game request to help her. dont get me wrong but in this game you only can ask 3 friends to help you and i am pretty much sure that many of her friends play it. so why me. and all of a sudden her profile climbs up in the chat list and we didn't talk at all, may be she is stalking me?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • When she 'Added you 2 years ago' yes-----You should have taken the initiation of starting the convo. I always had done this on FB, even if it was a "Hi" to let them know I am a friend. And Now you find------2 years and no talk.
    Go on FB and send her a message. She probably will be pleasantly surprised. When you see her lite on, begin your beguine by chatting. Just start out "Hi, how are you? Long time no talk..." and go from there. Also tell her about the game she has asked you to play, and perhaps you May be interested.
    No, I don't think she is 'Stalking' but just wants 'Talking.' Don't over think it.
    It's your call, your choice. You say you are Now 'Attracted' to her. Go for it now. No more games.
    I don't think you are 'Delusional,' but Now have to be 'Conversational.'
    Good luck. xx

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What Girls Said 15

  • Your over thinking this all of it and people add each other on Facebook all the time without talking to them just because they recognize a name. I have people in mine I Haven't spoke to in 20 years and I sometimes get bored and stalk their pages or send them game request bc they play a similar game or I was randomlly clicking people. I'd say the game request don't mean anything, if she wanted to talk to you that bad she would send you a message or at least personlize one of the game request. I'm super shy and sending texts, messages and making phone calls makes my anxiety really bad but even I can manage a hi so I think your reading to much into this.
    But that doesn't nean you can't or shouldn't message her just say hi it won't be weird you can always play it off like you were bored and none of the people you normally chat with were online so you thought you would catch up with some people from your past. You also need to realize if you haven't talked to her since 6th grade you don't know her anymore, you maybe physically attracted to her picure but she is now a stranger. And her post aren't going to tell you much everyone misrepresents themselves on facebook. I'm not saying they lie just that they are selective about what they post so they can represent themselves a certain way, you aren't getting the whole picture of who she is.
    With all that being said talk to her, start it just like you would any other girl you met and found attractive the only difference here is once the conversation gets going you can use what you see on Facebook and old memories to make the convo less awkward. For example if there is a lull say something like i noticed you posted you work at... your sister had a baby... you went to... just whatever she has RECENTLY put on there that sounds interesting (bonus points if you can relate or have also experienced it) hows that going.
    This happened to me last year with a guy I dated in high school thats what he did ended with a nice dinner

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  • Personally, I would be flattered, but at the same time kinda creeped out depending on how you took the conversation.

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    • will it still be weird if it was a very casual conversation?

    • No not at all! You're showing an interest in how she's been- Like I would suggest just asking how she's been, how her life's going. If she's in school, ask about that. Just keep it casual.

  • first of all i dont mean to be mean but game help requests is nothing your probably at the top of the list since your names probably at the top of the alphabetical list. so ignore that completely its Nothing.
    sometimes the people on Facebook move up the chats because youve talked to them most out of all people but sometimes they come up to the top because you have things in common on your about settings or games you play or similar pages you both like.
    to start a casual convo maybe say hi and see what she says if it becomes weird oe you feel you need to tell her why you started the convo (you won't but if it gives you an excuse to make the situation better) say you say her the other day or you were talking to a friend, cousin, sibling of hers.
    but
    1. Be so casual treat her like your talking to any girl dont give it away you like her too fat
    2. dont be clingy see how it goes :) hope i helped

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  • ok let's start with that
    first of all, maybe you should start a conversation with her, because you can't know much only by keep holding yourself back, a casual one, should be about hi, it has been a very long time, how was life with you... like that you can catch up, about the friend game thing maybe Facebook auto-select for her, sometimes Facebook selects people that doesn't play the game in your friend list, you'd better start talking to her get to know her, then you try to get her. good luck hope it'll help

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  • i say go for it, girls love it when guys step up and make the first move! but however i would take in to consideration that you haven't talked to her in 2 years so start off with small talk and as you talk more and more you can get into it depending on how she feels about you.. hope this helped :)

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  • I mean it would've been better if you had contacted you her especially after she added you after all this time... But I say go for it obviously she either likes you or wanted to be friends.

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  • Perhaps you could start up a conversation by asking her how things have been? I mean, if you haven't seen her in 10 years, it would be nice to catch up. This could then be a reason that you meet up in order to catch up? Then you could rebuild a relationship, maybe. If, say, she doesn't answer her message, then I, personally, would leave the message until she eventually does answer.
    About the game requests, it does seem as though she is personally seeking out your profile, if, as you said, only 3 people can be selected. This could perhaps be a sign she wants to communicate with you, or maybe she thinks you are often on Facebook, unlike other friends, so you would be more likely to help her?

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  • No, I don't think it's weird.

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  • Just maybe message her "Hey" then go from there

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  • You never know until you find out. Talk to her. You have nothing to lose.

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  • For starting the conversation. Just start by the casual greeting then ask how she's been doing lately and then you guys can start catching up and then after catching up you guys can talk about old memories and stuff. Hope this helped. Good luck!

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  • You should at least say "hey hows it going?" In a message Just to start the convo and see where it goes from there.. !
    It shouldn't hurt to say hi to her.

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  • Nope not at all, that's what Facebook is for!

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  • I wouldn't find it weird. Go for it.

    Good luck

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What Guys Said 5

  • It's probably a random fb add I think everyone has definitely seen a 'people you may know' of someone they went to school with but aren't really friends with and just added them.

    It might seem weird to contact her to be honest. Very put of the blue.

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  • Message her.

    Just say hey or something, what do you have to lose?
    As long as you're confident, you won't give off a creepy vibe, trust me. W

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  • I'd make a joke. You've been gone for years? If you left before 2001, I'd say to her, "Hey, did you hear? Sand n1ggers blew up the World Trade Center!" If you left before 2008, "Hey did you hear? Some n1gger got elected president of the United States!"

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  • Always make a move.

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  • All the best but use better English with her.

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