Why do shy guys and shy girls EXIST?

I have nothing against them.

It just pisses me off.

It's like a violation of human rights. It's not fair to them.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Updates:
Wow... I see I pressed the hot button.

Uh.. um... I was actually a shy guy in a bad mood when I wrote this.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, first of all. I was born! That is how I exist lol

    But figuratively speaking. Why do I exist as a shy girl? Because fucking idiots decided to make fun of me before and I can't help but feel hurt. And that made me insecure and self-conscious. And I wouldn't imagine myself being more outgoing. I simply dislike clubs, partying till you fall on the floor for being drunk and stuff like that. And most of the guys meet their future girlfriends in the club or out on a bar. I am shy, but once I get to know the person I become talkative.

    It's just my personality. And actually I've had popular people gotten to know me and they realized I have a nice personality. EVen one of the popular guys that was my ex-crush thought that, but got friendzoned because of the looks, which honestly I am not upset about, since it's true.
    And no we don't freaking cry for justice. I don't
    I'm trying to change myself regarding how I see myself and what I want in life and who doesn't like me as I am, I invite him to get out of my life. Simple as that.

    And there's a difference between lack of motivation and ambition and being shy. Shy doesn't stop you from getting what you want. My neighbor is a shy and really normal girl and she has the job that she wanted, one of the greatest guys you could ever meet ( And no she didn't go after him, he was crazy about her as she was) and they are getting married in August.
    So no, shyness doesn't affect this.
    I get what are you saying, but I don't think shyness holds us back. Insecurity does.

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What Girls Said 20

  • Violation of human rights? To be shy? wat.
    Idk, I've always been pretty shy and I'm ok with it. Most people realize it after having known me for a while, which makes them more easygoing with me, like they don't force me to talk loads with them or something because they know I'm having trouble with it. I like it, I suppose. But I can see how it's a problem for those who are literally too shy to function. That's definitely not good. But then again, I do believe shyness is something you can overcome. At least partially, as long as you're willing to put the effort into changing it. I used to be painfully shy (which I still am in some situations, of course) but I've become so much better at hiding it, which in turn has made me a little bit more confident. That's why I don't agree with you when you say "it's not fair to them", as if it's something they 100% can't change. They can. It's just that a lot of shy people choose not to, because they don't like stepping out of their comfort zone. Which, you know, is their own decision. If it's their own decision to not do anything about it, it's kind of their own fault in a sense.

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  • Why do shy guys and shy girls EXIST?
    Possibly because many people are lacking in social skills and people seemingly tend to be nervous or uncertain about new surroundings/people.

    Does anyone else feel this way?
    Likely others feel it is a violation of human rights and not fair to them as I find there are few views that a person is alone in having.

    I do not share the view that it's a violation of human rights as none of the human rights seem to be violated by being shy. As for fairness it seems in regards to relationships and interaction the concept of fair doesn't apply as it's about mutual interest.

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    • The right to freely walk up to someone and start chatting.

      The right to have your voice heard in a large crowd.

      The right to take to steps to start what could be a fruitful relationship.

      These are some of the human rights violated.

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    • That's not necessarily true. The definition of shy general means 'being reserved or having or showing nervousness or timidity in the company of other people'.

      Being reserved, nervous, or timid doesn't necessarily equate to being scared to do any of the things you listed. Especially the 'take to steps to start what could be a fruitful relationship'.

      What definition of shy are you using that consists of being afraid to do such things? o. O

    • People also have issues with anxiety. I know plenty of shy people who aren't awkward and can hold conversations just fine

  • That's like asking why do Gay people exist?

    Many people would also say I have nothing against them. (Actually some people would)

    It just pisses me off.

    It's like a violation of human rights. It's not fair to them.

    Does anyone else feel this way?

    My answer is it's just who they are, their personality, the way they were born, and it's nothing wrong with it.

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  • Some people are introverts others are extroverts. I for example am an INFP. Other people exhaust me so I have to recharge, it's the opposite for extroverts. Nothing wrong with that, we need quiet/shy people to create a balance.

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  • I think it has a lot to do with a persons anxiety. Honestly I'm shy when I first meet people in large groups... But once I get to know people I don't shut up. I assume that's the same with most shy people but I think it had more to do with a persons anxiety if that makes sense. But then again it depends on the circumstances of the situation.

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  • It is just a personal trait. No big deal about it. Trust me world would be very boring, if all the human beings were extrovert. World needs some balancing.

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  • I'm shy, but I don't really care. It's just who I am. I can't see myself being super outgoing, it wouldn't be me.

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    • :) Then you don't apply to my grievances

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    • Poetic license. My feelings are directed toward the trait, and what it has been known to deny people.

    • What does shyness deny someone?
      I've personally never met a shy person who just lets an opportunity pass them by. I don't think that has anything to do with shyness, more like lack of ambition or motivation.

  • Ugh I totally agree with you! I’m so shy sometimes and it always held me back from what I wanted in life. Some say shyness is good but I say shyness is a freakin disaster >__< Lol

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  • im a pretty shy girl and even i get pissed off at myself for being too shy often
    so i know what you mean

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  • They exist because they were born.
    In real life I'm pretty shy, online not so much.
    Being shy or not, that depents on your personality.
    Being shy isn't a violation of human rights.
    Some people are just shy, you better accept that fact =)

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  • Yes I feel the same.

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  • Haha I'm a hypocrite. Because I'm a shy girl but I don't like it when a guy is shy. Well honestly I think its cute sometimes when a guy is nervous to approach me but sometimes it gets annoying.

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    • Are you talking about HOW shy?

  • I get your point

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  • I am not shy but sometimes I do like shy guys.

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    • Then there is a balance.

  • It's just their personality. I don't see where you're coming from lol...

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  • I am. Wish I wasn't. But I also wish loud obnoxious people didn't exist either : P

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  • a person's personality doesn't violate their rights, if a shy person thought that they were putting themselves at a disadvantage or that they were in an unfair situation I'm sure they'd do whatever they can to help themselves. Being shy isn't some curse.. That's like saying it's unfair that assholes aren't very likable. You had said in a comment that shy people don't get what they want. Speaking from experience as a shier person, if I really want something, I WILL get it.

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  • As a shy person, yes sometimes I get pissed that I am this way. But when you think about it, there needs to be shy people in the world to balance things out. Without us, I think the world be a lot more chaotic haha :)

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    • I think the word shy in your context should be replaced with disciplined

    • I mean, shy people aren't necessarily disciplined. I'm just saying if everyone wasn't afraid to speak their mind and get what they want all the time, I think there would be more conflict in the world.

    • Discipline prevents people from doing certain things, because it's sloppy to do otherwise. Shyness does the same, only with reasoning you know is just an excuse not to venture outside your comfort zone.

  • What is so terrible about being shy?

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    • If you don't take initiative, you don' t get what you want.
      The shy don't get what they want.

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    • I felt the implication was clear

    • And yet you contradict yourself. Make up your mind

  • I am a shy girl and yeah, it pisses me off too. Unfortunately, don't really know how to overcome it :(

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What Guys Said 14

  • How would you know you are 'normal' if other types didn't exist? ;)

    Don't pity them, don't mock them, don't try to understand them - stand by them if they mean anything to you else why bother with things that you can't be productive about?

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    • Plus he failed to submit his suggestions or remarkable ideas on how to improve/help shy people. Clearly,
      this is the attitude of a whiner bud. I hated it!

    • Thanks Bro, Ill keep that in my mind. BP level: Normal... :)

  • Because we're born that way and there's nothing unhealthy or wrong about it, regardless of what idiots like Sigmund Freud might think.

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    • It is if it holds you back from something that would make you happy

  • Im shy and proud!!! Plus shy girls are hot, just saying. Also some people may be shy because something may of happened to them when they where younger, you never know,

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  • I think your family plays a big part in whether you end up being shy or not. If you have a very active and social family you probably wouldn't end up as a shy one. I used to be shy myself, but then I gained more self confidence (I really don't know why or how, it just happened).

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    • I agree with this fellow right here.

    • That's not true, my family is large and most are super outgoing, and Im introverted as hell.

    • I don't think family plays a big part. At least not always.:) My mother is really not shy and I am. Neither is my dad, once he is relaxed around a person.
      I became shy because of other people. You should've seen me in 5th grade haha, I didn't care about anything. Then I got made fun of and things changed.

  • cuz of immature and judgmental people so get yo facts straight. the past in their early childhood has sumting to do with it from being tease and make fun of as a kid.

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  • quality post and good answer form the ladies.
    So the next question is...
    Why a guys like you EXIST?
    I have nothing against you..
    It just pisses me off.
    It's like your a violation of human rights.

    Welcome to Planet Earth...

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    • Welcome to planet Earth - I like lol

    • Hate nothing bro, hate is a very deep and intense sentiment. The more you hate, the more you may become like it cause you are on it all the while :D Despise is better ;)

    • Good luck on that count brah :D

  • Because everyone is different? Being shy doesn't always have to be a negative thing.. if you feel bad about being shy you can always try and open up more and take on challenges that normally would be out of your comfort zone.

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  • I do not understand what you mean by violation of human rights in this context.

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  • In real life I'm shy because I can't tell by someone's body language what they think of me, and I also have no confidence to do what other men do (walk up to girls at interact with them) but on the internet its easy to see (for me this is) because all a girl has to do is aend send a couple of winks and kisses and then you know she's flirting.

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  • I know eh.

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  • Can't say that I do.

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  • Sometimes I wonder to myself why douche bags like you exist, then I remember that this world is a cruel and unforgiving place.

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  • Pisses you off? You can imagine how us shy people must feel then!

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    • I imagine your cry for justice is 10 decibels louder than mine.

    • And I think mine is pretty damn high.

    • Haha, +10db is about right!

  • Lol.

    I think my favorite personality type is an INTJ. I would prefer a shy person over an obnoxious idiot any day. I hate overly-talkative people who chit-chat-talk-crap all day and are fat-ass gossip cows. More so guys who are like this come off as very flamboyant to me.

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