Guys, would you date a pole & lap dancer?

I just broke up with my boyfriend and I'm looking for another one, there's a guy working in a coffee shop I'm flirting with him all the time and he's my next goal, do you really think he will date me?
( I won't use him for sex or anything else)) I just want a relationship with him, believe it or not but i can't get him out of my mind.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes. it's only a job we all got to work.

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    • It's amazing that you don't mind it

    • why is that we all need someone to love. at the end of the day/night she would be coming home to me.

What Guys Said 25

  • I have dated a stripper and had no problem with that. I knew that she probably had sexual involvement with bar personnel and some customers, but as a part of her personal life. A lap dancer is rubbing against customers, often getting them off for pay. And you stated that you also blow some customers. You have crossed into what most consider prostitution and though I could have a serious relationship with a woman that got paid to be nude and that guys would fantasize about, as soon as she actively provides sexual gratification (by touching, blowing, etc.) she is no longer someone I could be serious about. If she had done it in the past and no longer was doing it, I would consider it just the past and be okay with her as she is now.

    And for anyone wondering why it would not bother me if she was nude and guys fantasized about her, consider that many guys see a fully clothed hot girl and fantasize about her. I think that even with girls who accept that guys have probably fantasized about them, they would be surprised by how many actually have. So a gal does not have to be nude to provide fantasy material. But when she touches it goes beyond what is happening in his mind.

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    • So you would date a girl like that? Or only for sex like the others

    • I have dated a stripper, and would again, but not if she was including sexual contact for pay (which also ups the chances of STDs). It would not be just for sex, but I imagine the sex would be hot, even if much of it was just the thought of a girl that was the center of so much attraction was giving it only to me.

      Dating her only for sex would enter a guy's mind, but with the amount of disease found to be passed by oral sex, that would strike me as taking a poor chance.

    • Interesting

  • I wouldn't go out of my way to date one, but if we got along as people and had meaningful and exciting conversations and they made me feel happy when they are around, then I don't see why not. I don't see why people are judging it/you so harshly - dancing is just dancing, not prostitution.

    I would hold them to the same standard I'd hold any girl - they have to have the looks and personality I like, and they have to be healthy and not using hard drugs - and preferably non-smoker, but not absolutely required. And no kids yet. Other than that, no problem.

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    • You're very honest

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    • Thank you so much :') I'll be more careful

    • I mean, don't go any further than just dancing, with the customers. Don't put yourself at risk. Be safe and smart.

  • I used to date a pole dancer and she was really great. I never had a problem with her pole dancing in fact I loved it. :)
    But there were problems elsewhere and the relationship didn't stick.

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    • Being jealous for her?

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    • Seems like she used the control thing to keep you from cheating yourself...

    • Thank you.
      As for finding someone better I can't imagine how something like this will happen anytime soon because I've never felt like this for someone and I've never felt this from someone. So it's going to be tough and I doubt I'll ever get over it unless it get's some closure. Because she was everything I always wanted but never imagined that I could find but did. A once in a life time true love thing that could never be found somewhere else. I hope I might be wrong but it doesn't feel this way. :(

      I'm not going to say that I would never cheat but I have never cheated even though I have had opportunities and temptations.

  • I wouldn't date her monogamously. Friends with benefits or open relationship maybe. You can tell me she could be loyal and it is probably true, but knowinf she's constantly stripping and lap dancing for the sexual pleasure of other men would put me off.

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    • You can simply ask her to change her job

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    • She shouldn't have to change her job for you

    • Precisely my point.

  • No, never!.. My girl must belong to me, if not I don't date with her... She must dance or tease to me only...

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    • Because she's a pole dancer it doesn't mean that she's a bad girl and she will cheat on you with someone else! She can be loyal to you like any other girl

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    • You can tell her that

    • The problem with strippers is that they are allowed to drink as well. If it's a 21 and over club (like most are), they are going to be drinking... and well, girls do things when they're drunk, if you know what I mean. I'm just sayin'

  • Don't just hurry into another relationship after your break up. Take your time to learn and heal from the previous one. You make it sound like dating is a class project.
    Answering whether he'd date you or not would be assuming that every man is the same, which is not true. We can only give you our perspective on pole/lap dancers, but you'll never know on which side this particular guy falls under until you tell him. Good luck.

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    • Most guys dating only for sex

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    • She's trying to get validation. She wants a yes

    • If she's on here she should expect people to give their real opinions... and to shut up if she doesn't like them

  • I wouldn't, but that doesn't make you undateable. Just watch for guys who feel that since you pole dance, you must be easy! :)

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  • A stripper, you mean?

    That's not the sort of girl you date, that's the sort of girl you keep for FWB.

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  • Yup, dancers of all types are welcomed; tap dancers, salsa dancers, modern dancers, ballet dancers, pole dancers... you are probably always horny... knowing you are doing, that would take some serious effort on both our parts to keep a relationship though... It might work

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  • Do you ever blow customers for money?

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  • Maybe, I'd get to know more about her before saying no. Who knows, she might be a keeper, did I mention free naked lap dances ;)

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  • Have you ever heard of "Diaries of a Call Girl"?

    That show dealt with similar issues.

    She tries to keep her professional life separate from her "good girl" life.

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  • I don't think so.

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  • No, sorry. I once reconnected with an old friend who revealed that she stripped for awhile. Well, she later confessed herself to me too. I couldn't do it. I'm just not that kind of guy.

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  • You just broke up with someone.. You are vulnerable, easy target.. I am sure you dont want a relationship

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    • I don't need to be sad for someone wanted me for his sexual needs! I broke up with him so it's not the end of the world he's just another idiot so I'm not even sad because i deserve someone better than him.

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    • I'm like any other girl! I have feelings and i need things like everyone else.
      Because i work in that job it doesn't make me a bad person or player or whatever you call you it,

    • Lol deff not what i meant.. But ok

  • As long as dancing is all you do... But I'd still have some doubts.

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    • About what?

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    • Thank you because you was honest

    • I hope you find a guy who really can appreciate you for who you are. Good luck.

  • if you can separate what you get paid for and have a normal relationship, I would definitely.

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    • I can change myself for him if that's what he wants

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    • He's saying you shouldn't have to change yourself for a guy... he should appreciate you no matter what. The girl I like who I met in the club? I never asked her to cut down on her hours... she simply did it herself. She went from working 4 days a week (when I met her) to once every other week. I never asked her for it

  • No chance in hell brah!

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  • It'd be pretty difficult to take a girl like that seriously.

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    • The way I figure it, she probably won't be doing it all of her life. Most girls at strip clubs? Are just doing it to get by for now... the problem is, they then have to go through the rest of their lives, putting "stripper" on their resume

  • Don't do things for own satisfaction do it for the satisfaction of both of you

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  • No I wouldn't.

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  • I currently like a girl like this

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  • Nope i will never ever date such women. Sorry

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    • Thank you for your honesty

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    • I just wish that he gets cured and get back to his normal life..

    • Thank you :')

  • No I couldn't.

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  • Unless she did it as like a hobby? then nah.

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What Girls Said 1

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