Don't know what to do about this guy anymore? Should I just give up?

We met 5 years ago and I had an instant crush on him. Long story short, even though back in the days I sort of felt there was a connection between us and it could be reciprocated, he was taken. We both moved to different towns, ha had a kid and well life went on. Until lately when he told me he was not with his girlfriend anymore.
I don't know if he's a friend or just an acquaintance. I don't talk to him often (maybe a few times a year over emails) I haven't seen him in nearly four years.
It took me a long time to get over him and now that he's told me he's not with her anymore I find myself falling back for him all over again and wanting to see if something could come out of this.
A part of me wonders why he contacted me again, and why he told me this. I wonder if maybe he has some feelings left.
And another part feels like it's really stupid, first because he seems to still be quite bitter over his break up (he told me that many things led her to not love him anymore and that even if he did love her he didn't took care of her well enough so I'm guessing he still has feelings) even though he insisted on the fact that it's been a year. Also he doesn't seem eager to talk to me, doesn't ask for my phone or to meet me. For example it's been over three weeks that he hasn't replied so...

So I guess I'm torn in between trying to pursue him (knowing we both live in different towns...) and just simply giving up, letting it go. But it's difficult since I'm more the type to go after what I want and try to see if things work. I don't want to have regrets, and yet at the same time I don't want to be the pursuer.

What should I do?


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What Girls Said 2

  • " Also he doesn't seem eager to talk to me, doesn't ask for my phone or to meet me. For example it's been over three weeks that he hasn't replied so..."

    Give up. He's using you as a rebound. Go find someone better.

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    • Yes you're probably right. It doesn't sound very promising right? I've thought about being a rebound if I ever had a chance (and this doesn't sound pleasant) but so far i'm wondering if I should just be friendly as I've always been and see where this leads?

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  • Go after him! You never know unless you try! You don't want to give up and then regret it! You'll soon find out whether he's genuine or not! And all you can do is try

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    • Yes you're right, usually I would try and see where it goes because this the way I proceed for everything but well, I 'm afraid there are some clear signs that it's hopeless. I'm really annoyed by the fact that he would reply and then stop for weeks as if he had forgotten..

    • He's a guy! Some don't realize you're waiting... Sometimes you have to decide whether its worth waiting for him to reply or if you should just walk away and if he eventually realizes that you're amazing then you hold the power.

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