How can I stop thinking he is cheating on me?

I have had trust issues in the past and still do from guys I have dated in the past. My bf and i have been dating for almost 11 months and lived together for 9 months as he is the one that asked me to move in with him. He can be a jerk but then again he can be a sweetheart which is why I stay with him. Well his dad can also be a jerk which I think just runs in the fsmily. I do over think things which is another problem. I have accused him of cheating but I have no proof I just think it in the back of my head when he is out with friends or flirts with a girl. My ex cheated on me which is now my fear of my current bf doing the same. Sometimes I will think he is texting another girl. He let's me see his phone whenever. Something thay bugs me is how he gets turned on by girls to easy. He says he doesn't and thay I just think it because I don't trust him. He knows my issues but yet he still stays with me. I've told him before that maybe we need a break but he never wants to. He always tells me he will never cheat on me. And he wants to be with me forever. But sometimes he doesn't act like he wants too. How can I stop thinking he is cheating on me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • What do you mean sometimes he doesn't act like he wants to? Everyone's a jerk sometimes, but it sounds like the guy is pretty decent. When you get suspicions just think about how he's never done anything to make you not trust him, and hanging out with friends that are girls isn't really anything bad. He shouldn't be flirting with other girls though, unless you meant you just thought he might be doing that.

    It does sound like you don't trust him, which is understandable given your situation from before, but you really just need to work on trusting him more day to day. He isn't your last boyfriend, so there's no reason he'd do the same thing your last boyfriend did.

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What Guys Said 4

  • It's a mental thing you have to get over and it can take awhile sadly. My gf had a few exes especially the last two cheat on her so she was very jealous and paranoid for a while. The moving in together I thought would easy your mind more luckily it did for my gf. He seems to be doing the right thing. My gf has passwords for any social media outlet, to emails to my phone. You just have to relax and calm yourself when you get that feeling. Taking a break is the worse thing you could do then there is no commitment during that time and if you get back together he might have that girl he met during your break still around. Just keep trying to improve your trust issues because it will strain your relationship and tire him out too. He seems like a good guy so try and cut him some slack even if your mind says otherwise.

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  • You need to realise that your current boyfriend is not your ex and you need to stop punishing your man for the mistakes of your previous man. If you cannot trust him, then you shouldn't be with him and if you continue to accuse him of cheating and displaying deep insecurities, eventually you'll drive him away from you.

    If your current boyfriend has given you no reasons for concern, then you need to just trust him. I know it's hard, but if you want this relationship to work out, then you need to build trust because that's one of the foundations of a healthy, loving and strong relationship.

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  • You do have trust issues and I feel it will take time. Girls with previous bad relationships in the past need to realize that's history. You are holding yourself back from maybe something that could be good. But then again if you have a constant feeling about him cheating. Then maybe you should take a step back analyze everything why you feel that way minus past relationships. And if it's nothing only time can tell. But if it's something jus follow what you feel, follow your heart.

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  • I think you should relax, stop recalling your ex's behavior, all relationships need trust, and when you occasionally find any proof, you can confront him about the way he treats you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Try thinking more positively about yourself and your relationship. If you go into something with fear and doubt then it will end up poorly. It's time to let past experiences stay in the past, and move forward with the chance to be in the kind of relationship you want to be in.

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