Is he worth waiting around for?

Okay, so now I've been seeing this guy for almost two months.

Into the third or fourth week that we were dating, I finally asked him what our relationship status was. (We acted like a couple, met each others families, etc.) so I thought it was appropriate time to ask. He said that he was mine and was only hanging out with me but that he didn't want any major commitments and wasn't ready for a girlfriend. I in turn told him that I was not going to wait around forever but if we agreed not to see other people that I'd continue to date him. He agreed and said that he wasn't interested in dating other people. He also canceled his membership from dating sites, so I think he IS serious about him and I, but I'm not always sure. He just got out of a 5 year relationship that was [on and off] a few weeks before he started talking to me. I'm worried that I'm just a rebound. His ex moved to a different state so I don't have to worry about her anymore.

I was planning on dating him until September, and if he hadn't asked me to be his girlfriend by then I was going to stop seeing him. Do you think that's enough time or that I've wasted enough time already?


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What Guys Said 1

  • He's just got out of a 5 year relationship. He won't want to jump straight into another, but it's possible you are not just a rebound. He just wants that "single" tag, that bit longer. You act like a couple, meet each others families, he's not seeing anybody else, your not seeing anybody else.

    Do you really need a 'tag' to define this relationship?

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    • Well, yeah. I think it is necessary to have title of being boyfriend and girlfriend. I don't know, I just think it makes it official. I just don't want to wait around forever and find out that he had no intention of ever asking me to be his girlfriend. And I don't want to bring up the topic again, because I don't want to nag him. I do think September is reasonable because then it'd be about four/five months, and that should be PLENTY of time to make a decision.

What Girls Said 1

  • You are both still very young and should not be worrying about relationships or getting serious. There is plenty of time for that when you are older. For now just have fun, meet new people, spend time with your friends and enjoy being young free and single.

    It is clear that he is interested in you and cares about you but he has just come out a long term relationship so there is a lot going through his mind and he is still feeling hurt. I think that he wants to take things slow with you, have fun with you and see where things lead but he is not ready to make it offical yet and I think that he is scared of hurting you as well.

    It sounds like he is really in to you and wants a good chance of things working but for that to happen he needs to take things slow and at his pace. The fact that he has deleted his online dating profiles and does not want to date any one else is a good sign!

    If you are happy with him, like him a lot and want a good chance then do things at his pace, don't rush him, sleep with him or ask him about being offical. Just have fun together and when the time is right he will have the offical talk with you.

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    • Unfortunately I've already slept with him twice.

      But I agree that it would be a good idea to stop sleeing together.

      To be honest, I don't want to waste time with him if the relationship is not going to go anywhere. I don't want to be played for a fool, or be seen as a rebound, friends with benefits, etc.

      In all honesty, I don't see this going past September if he hasn't made a move to make it official.

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