I don't understand how attraction works for some men. I've been on two dates with a guy I met online and I like him a lot and think we could be a perfect match. But both times he got out of the dates thinking I'm so nice, smart, easy to talk to, fun, absolutely nothing wrong with me here, etc., but he just didn't feel any sparks or attraction. I do know, though, that in the past he's always fallen for girls who make him laugh and challenge him, and physical attraction came after emotional connection. I think I have a good sense of humor too so I don't know what it is here that I'm not doing it for him.
Another big thing I can think of is that he's still fresh out of a failed relationship and hasn't gotten over his ex yet. Technically he's not really emotionally available or not in a good place to date around at all. He appears engaged and interested on our dates but I could sense that he's sometimes distracted. I don't think this is fair to me which sucks because I really like him and he's a great guy. Could his remainder feelings for his ex be in the way of him feeling anything toward me or anyone else? I keep thinking if that attraction is not there for him after two dates, it'll probably never come.
And the weird thing is he seems interested in continuing seeing me to see where it goes, which I also don't understand considering he doesn't feel the attraction/chemistry. I almost feel like having a talk about his feelings for his ex next time when I see him.
Most Helpful Guy
"Physical attraction came after emotional connection".
That's extremely unusual for men.
If he's telling the truth, its possible that he's emotionally unable to fully connect because he's not over his ex, hence he feels no spark.
But I think I've men like one guy like this, ever, in real life. More common would be guys who choose not to focus on physical side until there's an emotional attraction, and perhaps the physical attraction that he was in the past ignoring simply isn't there.0