So i'm pretty sure my guy friend is interested in me. He is one of my closest friends so I want to tell him my honest feelings, but I just can't figure them out myself :( Personality-wise I know he would be a perfect match (hes sweet, funny, caring and all that..). And I know I kinda do like him more than a friend. But physically I don't find him attractive and never really have for all those years, we've been friends now. I mean I don't have a problem if with casually touching, playfights and so on... but I can't imagine anything further than this. I know it's awful that I can't overlook this and I tried talking myself into it. It still bothers me so much though
Do you think I should still go for him or is a relationship bound to fail? would you rather be rejected by someone who thinks like this or would you be happy if that person is willing to try (because i think i would be)?
Most Helpful Girl
I've been with a guy who was less attractive but had everything going for him personality wise and for me, I was happy with that set up. Unfortunately you can't have everything, there's no complete package but you can get as close as you can to 'perfect' so long as you weigh up what matters to you most in a person :)
You can't make yourself like somebody no matter how much you justify them as a good partner in every other way. My mum made the mistake of marrying my dad because she thought he was a good, reliable man who would make a good father. But the chemistry wasn't there and they ended up separating. So while you love somebody's personality and love being around them, without any attraction it isn't really a relationship in it's hollistic sense. It is rather a brother/sister type relationship - which is what my ex and I now have, because our relationship didn't work.
It's natural to develop a very close friendship to a relationship because you click so well, but unless you find him in any way attractive you may well start looking elsewhere or not feel fully satisfied with the relationship in the long run. I think it's best to remain close friends personally, from experience. I firmly believe you can learn to find somebody a lot more attractive over time if you love their personality, but you have to find them somewhat attractive to begin with. I guess only you can really tell whether you'd be happy with compromising a lot attractiveness wise and whether his personality is enough to satisfy you :)
Good luck! :)2