What am I doing wrong? What do I have to do to be attractive to guys?

I'm 19 and I've never had a romantic relationship. Guys are friendly to me, but never anything more. I've never gotten signs from a guy that he has had any interest in me. I've been told I'm a smart, funny, sweet, and cute girl by family and friends. I'm 4"10', 90 lbs, and workout regularly. I have medium length brown hair and blue eyes. I'm a 34A, but my butt and legs are pretty nice. I have a higher pitched voice than most, almost child like. Guys either think its cute or annoying, either way they tease me. I do wear glasses/contacts and have amblyopia (my left eye drifts slightly out) People have told me it's not that noticeable (they're my family and friends though, they're not going to tell me anything that would make me feel bad about myself). My friends are either in relationships or go on dates regularly. It just gets me down to hear them gab about their bf and then about three other guys that are interested in them. Don't take this the wrong way, but I can't help thinking "Why not me?" I don't know what makes me "un-date-able". Guys can you give me any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You just described a wonderfully beautiful, cute petite girl that any male over 18 and over 5 feet would go for in a New York minute and almost made me wish I was not attached. Now I'm asking the same question about you that you are about yourself. I will assume that you are not a priggish professional virgin, religious fanatic, or right-wing nutcase and do not eat a lot of garlic. So, we are left with the Beautiful You.

    How about your social skills? Smile, eye contact, and ready, inoffensive conversation in appropriate doses. Look up operant conditioning, positive reinforcement, and behavior modification and learn all you can. Write a script of inoffensive things to say and remember them (Great day huh? Howyadoin? Great weather! I just saw Justin B). If you get nervous, take a deep breath and either keep to your script or listen to the person talking.

    Are you in the wrong place? You want lots of men to choose from, which ain't in a small town. Write about yourself, your whole autobiography even, to know who you are and what you like and don't like. You want to meet people like yourself, so you have to go where those guys go. You're at the gym, why aren't things happening there? If some hunk stares at you, stare back until he comes over and talks, then refer back to your script.

    Do you have style? Maybe you need a new "do" and sexier clothes. Your style should match your mentality as well as make a statement. These superficial elements should attract like-minded people. Look good, talk good, smell good, and so forth.

    Finally, at 19, you are still within the range of normal. Nature is working "the procreant urge of the world." You are female, they are males. Show it, they will come. It's just a matter of time if you are in the right place.

    I used to have lots of sex and fancied myself a player. But there were long periods when I felt I might never get laid again. It happens to everyone.

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    • Allow me to add to my already garrulous entry. If a guy is talking to you for a few minutes and you are sure he is not gay and not attached, why don't you invite him for a Starbucks et cetera? You pay.

What Guys Said 1

  • I think you are date-able. (:
    I would take you out if we lived in the same area but I live in another country sadly.

    You are not doing anything wrong girl, it is just that you lack friends. When you know more people, there is a higher chance you will meet a guy who likes you.

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    • So my advice to you would be to go and know more male peers.

What Girls Said 2

  • I'm in the same situation as you and I'm going to be 18 this year :)

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  • I have the same issue as you. I'm 22 and yea it's not good

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