Help girls, did I ruin things with her?

So I've thought this girl (with a bf) i work with had a crush on me for the longest time. When I first started she would stare at me in meetings and flip her hair around until I looked. She would like find ways to be around me all the time as I was constantly bumping into her. One day I stopped her in the hall to chat and she turned bright red and could barely talk. Shortly after this we were taking the same breaks in the morning and walking and talking together most daily, but be. She'd go missing on me for a while then come back. Over and over repeat. I began to ignore her bc I felt she was sending me mixed signals. This dance happened for about four months. There were times I felt she was flirting with my buddy too, sometimes in front of me sometimes she'd watch me while she did it. I also talked about hot girls in front of her. I began skipping many of our group lunches bc I didn't want to be made jealous. Over time things have grown weird between us. I felt she was moving towards my buddy and I ignored her for 2 months and was cold. He ends up telling me she had been walking/talking with him like we used to and he said it was creeping him out. So this weirdness between her and I is going on a year. She has been Skipping all of the group lunches for the last 7 months, except one when I was out of town and she was happy to tell me about it. I never really see her any more. Now a much younger buddy of mine and her are close and it makes me jealous. He's like really flirty and friendly and I've noticed he keeps going to her desk and chatting with her. They're in the same department down the hall. The other day they sat together at our company meeting. And last week I looked down the hall and saw her chatting at his desk. I walked over to them and she barely acted like I was there till I butted in and she changed her body language over to me and blushed. Then today I saw she emailed him saying he could pick the group lunch, even tho she never goes? Did I ruin it?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like you missed the boat on this bro. Time to throw up a Hail Mary. Go big or go home.

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    • How do you mean missed the boat?

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    • Crush might be a strong word here. But not out of the question. An interest in you? Definitely.

      Totally a chance she gets with someone. People do this kinda shit all the time everyday. A little tricky putting this kind of thing together though. Dangerous too as I've pointed out.
      You (or whomever) will need cooperative access to a private setting with this broad. You know, drinks after work, Christmas party, superbowl party. If you have a mutual friend with her than that person's house/apt. Next thing will be intoxication. Most people in her position can't cross this kind of line without more than a several drinks. From that point it's up to the guy to move it to an even more private setting. Bedroom, bathroom, garage, couch, whatever. See she's going to need to feel comfortable in the setting, yet inebriated enough to make a mistake or justify making pre/post mistake.
      Now if someone were to say have serious game and decent looks this could be pulled off a hell of lot more easily.

    • Man I can't tell if she'd all that. I didn't really notice her talking to my buddies until I started ignore thing...

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