Are you for child support. I'm against child support?

I always been against it. If the father doesn't want to take care of a kid he shouldn't have to


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree with you! that way girls would think better about who they are spreading their legs for. Responsible guys and responsible couples that just happen to get divorced and act like grown ups are going to take care of their kids.
    Scums that just want to fck with no protection and have a 100 kids with different girl... yeah they aren't gonna do shit. But that should be the girls fault for being so stupid. And the babies that come out of irresponsible choices shouldn't be denied a comfortable life just because two idiots couldnt hold their pants up.
    "how are those girls going to support their children?"
    well she should have thought about that, if she couldnt do it then she should have used protection or have an abortion.

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    • Exactly!!!

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    • EXACTLY !!! society is fucked up! its a double standard.
      they equally created a life (on accident, not out of love) and then she has more saying than him, but he has to pay for something he didn't want in the first place.
      how I see it is people that dont want to deal with consequences shouldn't be having sex in the first place.

    • thanks for MH

What Guys Said 15

  • Child Support has it's place, but I think part of the issue is that there's no good way to know when to, and when not to enforce it.

    If 2 people have a short term thing, perhaps a one-night stand or a friends with benefits agreement, you know - something with no expected long term commitment, and she gets pregnant and suddenly decides she's keeping the kid, she should not be allowed to force him into Child Support.
    She knew full well he didn't want a kid, so it's on her back to raise and pay for the kid if she decides to keep them.
    Her right to bodily autonomy gives her the final say in whether or not she sees the entire pregnancy through. But it does not entitle her to the unwilling dads wallet.

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    • Yeah agreed 100 percent

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    • Sir, should a man not take responsibility for failing to protect himself from impregnating a woman who he has no desire to be with long term? I don't mean to sound condescending, but a pregnancy produced from intimacy starts with a man. If a guy risks impregnating a woman, he should be held accountable.

    • No. He shouldn't. 2 adults had sex with the intent of it just being for fun with no promise of long term commitment. She knew he had no responsibility to raise or fund a child when they clearly had no plans for a family together.

      A pregnancy does not start with a man - it starts with 2 competent adults.

  • I am for it.

    It doesn't matter if the man doesn't want the child. When you have sex, you are making a decision to commit an adult act.

    WITH these decisions, come REAL consequences. You as a man, and her, as a woman, need to FACE those consequences, whether you want to or not. Sorry, but life doesn't come with erasers.

    Now obviously, many women can abuse the child support money for their own selfish purposes, and I wish there was a way to 100 percent regulate it, but that's impossible. But either way, HIS decision, HIS consequences.

    I would expect no less from a woman either.

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  • If two people make a baby two people can raise the baby. Even if one is only supporting him or her financially.

    If a married couple had a baby that was an accident. The father didn't want the kid from the start. Should he be permitted to not contribute any money to the raising of the child? So if he did all the shopping and wouldn't buy diapers, baby food, clothes etc. He got his own bank account and had his pay deposited directly into it so the mother could not access it.
    Would that be OK in your opinion?

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  • I think its complicated.

    I would have to search around to find it, but i have seen studies suggesting child support levels incorporate de facto alimony.

    I think the first issue is that physical custody should be 50/50 far more often. At that point, you're looking at support only due to income differentials.

    But I'm not sure that even makes sense, or to do it aggressively makes sense. If Parent A is poor, and Parent B is rich, then maybe the reality just is, the kids live like rich kids with B and poor kids with A. That's how it is?

    My guess is the main reason this doesn't happen is that in some cases, Parent A would be eligible for government support, and the government would rather not pay it and send Parent B the bill.

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    • In Bermuda, if the parent who is paying the child support earns more than the parent who cares for the child, that parent has to pay enough so that the child has the same level of living as if the child were living with the parent with a higher income. That makes sense I hope. Lol

  • I'm against it unless the guy consented to the pregnancy. Even after the sex act, there's the moment of decision once a pregnancy is discovered. The woman has the option to accept responsibility for a new child or to stop being responsible for a pregnancy, either by abortion or by giving it up for adoption. The man should be able to choose whether to accept or deny that responsibility as well.

    To hold one gender responsible without consent while allowing the other to abdicate responsibility is sexist and discriminatory, so I'm against it.

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  • I'd say child support is necessary, but as a result it also has its abuses.

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    • No it's not necessary
      If the girl decides to have sex, knowing she is the one who can get pregnant then she is held responsible.

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    • I can care less
      I'm sticking to my opinion that in against child support
      When two people are married, the man should be the provider and the woman is the one who is taking care of her children more on an emotional level
      THEN...
      If a girl decides to leave her man, then she will be the one who needs to raise the kid
      If a girl has a one night stand and decides to keep it then she will have to be the one in charge of finances

    • Here I'll try one more time:

      If you say you're a liberal, the implication entails being for abortion, would you accept if your loved one was aborted? That's the pragmatic effects of endorsing an idea.

      Now if you say you're conservative, that also entails refusing abortion, even to a loved one who has been raped.

      Now your idea about excluding child support entails excluding space for error in judgment, say car accidents that kill as murder, getting pregnant by accident, insurance because mistakes happen etc. Are you willing to accept ALL the pragmatic effects? You have to put your money where your mouth is. If you don't care, then you're essentially refuting your own argument.

  • Lol how on earth can you be against child support

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    • Because girls abuse. Why should a man have to be finically responsible for a child he doesn't want. Even if he does care about the child he shouldn't be handing checks to a girl who he is not with.

    • Most the time that's not the case, when I parents split there's no way a single mum can raise kids and pay bills without any support. A dad can still work though and make money, so why can't he contribute to his own kids, if it weren't for child support there would be many more problems

  • I agree but only on the condition that they give up all parental rights to the child.

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  • I agree with you.

    These days, having sex cannot be viewed as a legally-binding agreement to have a child, which is why abortion is legal without the man's consent. But the law isn't being equal in allowing women to impose child support on men.

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  • Personally I feel that child support should be handled differently. The person with custody should make a list of what they need for the children, then the other person buys it for them. It's too easy for child support to be abused when the person receiving it can spend it on whatever they want.

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  • Yes but I believe that the person getting the child support should have to provide evidence that all the money is being spent on the kid/s with exceptions like taking them to the movies, out to eat, gas in the car. She shouldn't be spending any of the money on a new clothes for her , a date or jewelry for herself.

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  • I just hope you aren't in a position where you're a single Mother struggling to get by because the man who knocked you up has gone awol and left you on your own.

    If you're man enough to pump someone without using a johnny, you're man enough to pay for the basic up keep of your child/children.

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    • That's the thing though, a lot of the single parents are because one of the two left the other with the child and didn't take responsibility for it.

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    • It happens more often than we think it does. And that's not the only scenario that comes up where the mother is left alone to raise a child.

    • If the dude dies then yeah I agree, if he's a veteran of Iraq or Afghanistan and needs assistance, I agree, if he's a scum bag who's run away because he's a scaredy cat, then he should be made to work in the mines of Moria to pay for his children.

  • The thing is child support is a system that predates feminism and women's liberation.
    It was invented during patriarchy to ensure the well being of children and women.
    Because women were not allowed to work.

    Now feminists don't want to abolish that, because they can abuse the system and get child support, while being with multiple new guys, and don't have to work. It is an outdated system, that is against men in a terrible world.

    My personal point is, that if I ever marry I will not divorce. So I will never pay child support.
    Any divorce note or whatever it is called I will not sign.

    If she would try to steal my house, money, anything, I would move into the woods and burn everything to the ground. If I can't have a happily ever after with her and our children, I'll make sure she regrets her decision for the rest of her life. I might even destroy her face and breasts with acid, so no man will ever be interested in her again.

    If she is good to me, I will treat her like the queen she deserves to be.
    If she is bad to me, I will unleash hell on earth for her.

    I will never pay child support.

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    • Hahahahah exactly! Even when you decide to divorce, do it when the kids are 18

      Then again some men would rather kill their wives so they don't have to pay child support or she doesn't get anything. That's justice to them

  • Do you think the taxpayer should feed and cloth a persons mistake, i think not.

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    • This is the #1 reason why child support will remain intact in my opinion

    • I agree

  • I am for it. Sometimes you people make it seem like you have to have sex, like some kind of sex zombie.

    Here's an earth shattering revelation: You do not have to have sex.

    Here's another: You don't have to masturbate, either.

    Your body was designed to operate without failing without either of those things, until you can find the mate who you are going to want to spend the rest of your life with.

    How about... Not having sex? I think men should pay for their mistakes of being horn dogs, and I think women should have to pay, too. You are literally creating a life... Then throwing it away. What does that say about you as a human being? That you could care less about your fellow man, let alone, someone you are responsible for bringing into the world?

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What Girls Said 14

  • A man brought a life into this world, he's obligated to make sure the child is able to have a comfortable life, no matter what. It's both parent's responsibility. We as a society are obligated to take care of eachother as it's our responsibility. Men will always find excuses to justify their reckless actions and give them free will to carry out their sexual urges without thought. We must do whatever is possible to make sure our children are taken care of. Hence why there are strict punishments for not paying child support. Prison time, freezing of bank accounts ect. Im sure you'd think differently if you became pregnant, and a guy tried to walk away on you, and you'd have significant issues financially taking care of your child.

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  • Child support is actually a good thing. If you're a single mother and you're raising a kid, it's really hard, especially if you don't have much help, if any, from your family. It's even harder if you have twins. Once you raise your own kids as a single parent, you will see the hardships in it and will see how child support is beneficial for both the child and the parent raising the child or children. There are also many circumstances that go around it.

    It has been proven that if the parent cannot properly have the right surrounding for the child to grow up it, the child will actually lose I. Q. points due to the lack of sufficient input in the child's learning environment.

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    • That's why girls shouldn't have kids with deadbeats

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    • I don't think a lot of women will want a baby that the rapist gave her
      Even if she did, if she went for child support then the child will have to see the rapist?
      Makes no sense

    • I said what if she got raped? There's all kinds of scenarios where mothers are left as single mothers and that doesn't only mean that she slept around or the father is an all around deadbeat. Sometimes the father could also pay for everything he does until kids come into the picture. Nothing is ever as clear cut as the mother slept around and decided that she'll keep the baby because she wanted a child. There are circumstances around everything. You don't know every case and you don't know every scenario. A lot of the scenarios is that a lot of the single parents do need the money to help raise the child or children they have.

  • Just like a child that kicks and screams to not pick up after a mess they made - someone with more sense and maturity has to walk in and tell them to do it whether they like it or not. Hoping someday they mature enough to realize a mess they helped make, they gotta help clean.

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  • People seem to think that child support is to punish the man or reward the woman. Its not. Its to ensure that a child, of both parents creation, is provided for.

    I do think that paternity tests should be compulsory though.

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    • It is a reward to the mother. Why should she be handed money

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    • There are always people who abuse the system. That doesn't mean it should be scrapped.
      And justbeinghonest if you're insinuating she can and should get an abortion, not all women believe in them.

  • It is most certainly NOT solely the girl's fault to get pregnant. A girl does not get pregnant on her own. A girl gets pregnant with a boy. If both engage in stupid behavior, BOTH should get punished. How in the world is a girl getting "rewarded" with child support when she also has to financially take care of the child as well as physically care for it?

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    • Some women will do this to "trap" a guy... the Asker is thinking more about addressing the abuse of the child support system, than the actual raising of the baby itself.

    • True. However, due to the broad context of the question, it leaves room to say that if two people make a mistake, two people should have to own up to it. Not solely one.

  • I'd like to see you raise a child with out the help of the father. Good luck with that! It's possible but it takes two to make a babies. If a dude going to plant his seed then a dude should take responsibility for his garden so to speak!

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  • I'm for it. I know some people are irresponsible with how they're spending it but child support actually helps my mother. It helps with groceries and my medical bills. I guess everyone is different. Maybe they should just keep track of how some people are spending it.

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  • I am for child support.

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  • No one said he had to take care of it. He just has to be financially responsible. If the father doesn't want a kid I guess he shouldn't have had sex without birth control.

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  • Well, it comes down to the fact that 2 people made the child so two people should support it.
    I want to make sure my child is taken care the best they can be.
    In my case, my younger sons dad left the country 4 years ago and has not financially supported him at all. This has put a great strain on me as, even though I work full time, my job isn't a very well paid one. I feel like I can't provide for my son as well as I would like to due to lack of finances.

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    • And just to clarify, I was in a long term relationship with this man and we both made the decision together to have a child. Unfortunately, things changed between him and I a while after having our son.
      By no means do I think it makes it my fault and should have to deal with it on my own. I had the child under the assumption that both parents would be in his life and both parents would support it.
      As for the mother being handed the money... If the child lives with the mother full time, of course the mother should receive it. It goes toward the food the child eats, the clothes the child wears, the roof he is under. There are many factors taken into consideration when it comes to child support. Although some women may abuse it, others use it as it should be used... For the care if the child.

    • I think that's true in a lot of places... and I'm wondering (genuinely, I'm not sure) if that really makes sense.

      Rich kids get more spent on them then say middle class kids. If one parent is rich, the other middle class... why should they necessarily live like rich kids at both, UNLESS the rich parent chooses to pay for it? (Nobody prevents people from voluntarily paying support!). I'm not sure that governments should insist on it.

      The trend has been to essentially make it so kids are no worse off after a divorce. Which means someone (non custodial parent usually) is FAR worse off. While it would be lovely for kids to be no worse off post divorce, i'm not sure we should legislate things that way. In fact, I'm pretty sure we shouldn't, but that lobby groups have gotten it that way saying 'its best for the children its best for the children'

    • I'm not saying I agree with it. That's just the way child support is calculated here. I don't feel the parent who doesn't have custody should pay out the ass. But I do feel the parent should provide child support based on the cost of living in the area you reside.
      As it stands, I don't receive any financial support from the father.

  • Man giving his sperm, then it means he has responsible of his sperm until its death of it. Lol

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    • So why can't a man have say in if the girl keeps the baby or not?

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    • LOLOL "it's her body"
      It's his money too

    • I think saving the baby idea should be discussed between two parts. I am against when people say it is girls body etc. They are doing it together. They are both responsible of their action.

  • Of course I'm for it. Both the man and woman are equally responsible for the existence of that child. The mother shouldn't be the only one supporting it financially.

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  • If the child was planned, he can't just change his mind, he decided to create a life so he should stick to that.
    If it was a casual thing, and the girl fully knows he wasn't her boyfriend, wasn't taking her seriously, and she will more than likely be a single mother but she made that decision alone, then no he shouldn't have to pay.
    I think it's kind of unfair that guys have no say about keeping a child or not sometimes. Sometimes he wants it, she doesn't, so she has an abortion, or the other way round. If he can take care of it alone, that should be allowed to.

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  • I don't agree, he helped in the act he should have some responsibility, even more so if he plans to not stay with the girl.

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    • he should go half in with an abortion

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    • If he didn't want kids so badly, he shouldn't be sleeping around. Or he could get fixed. Either one works for me.

    • If she agreed also for the abortion, but if not, below applies.

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