My boyfriend and I have known each other for two years now and have dated for the last eight months.
I have problems trusting him, and it's extremely frustrating. I bought his iPad from him, and he left his Facebook logged in. I know I invaded his privacy, and that gives him reason not to trust ME, but I found out he was secretly dating a girl and cheating on her by hooking up with me and seeing me behind her back. This is months before we started dating.
Now we live together. We talk about the future. We talk about getting married and having kids. He constantly shows me affection, and he hasn't given me reason to believe he has been cheating on me. He evens shows me his texts and direct messages on social networks. But I can't shake the thought of "once a cheater, always a cheater," and my distrust in him is creating problems. I'm always questioning where he's going, who he's going to be with, and any female that he makes contact with fills me with jealousy.
He denies ever having a relationship with the other girl. They don't even speak to each other anymore, and according to Facebook she's in a relationship with another guy, and they were dating before we started dating.
Am I the one who's to blame for being jealous and possessive? Or are my suspicions warranted?
Most Helpful Guy
Honestly no relationship will stand if it was build on lies and deceit. He lied to the girl he was with while hooking up with you. Never said anything to you about it? or did you know you were the other woman.
the issue here is that you either bite the bullet and say hey I know you did what you did, or you STFU and go with it. If you tell him you went through his FB you look like a jerk, if you tell him you have trust issues because of his actions that you found out by going through his FB you still look like a jerk, you were worried to begin with when you went through his FB to begin with. So now either you follow through, or you tear down your relationship being a possessive paranoid weirdo. If you suddenly become possessive and everything he is going to know something is up.
So you need to get over it, or come clean.0