Why aren't nerdy guys attracted to pretty African American girls?

Hello everyone! I am a 20 year old African American lady. Im pretty attractive, wholesome and i have a great personality. Im fun, some what shy (so people say), goofy (when im comfortable), and have a strong moral background. I am frequently approached by guys... yet not the type of guys that im attracted to. Athletes and "cool guys" usually approach me. Of course they are respectful because i carry myself with such poise that warns them to come correct. although i enjoy the compliments, im not attracted to those kind of guys. i like guys that are "nerdy' (glasses, slim, socially awkward lol and loves knowledge or finding the answer. (I think its attractive to learn from a guy... :/ lol) The only problem is, nerdy guys dont really look at me... AT ALL. I've only had one bf in my life who was nerdy... but he didn't even initially like me... and i thought he did (how embarrassing and discouraging) They either like other nerdy girls or dont like/ avoid black women. Although there was a stereotype that black women have attitude or whatever, i think its unfair that these type of guys deliberately avoid me and i am FAR from having "attitude." Its very discouraging, so much so that I've considered dating internationally (Africans!) so i guess my question is why dont nerdy (African american) males overlook pretty African American ladies?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because history has shown that pretty women go for athletes, badboys, players, etc, about 99.9% of the time. You're a exception I guess, and that's probably why they overlook you.

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    • I guess... i just know so many pretty girls that like nerds. Thanks!!

What Guys Said 6

  • "... so i guess my question is why dont nerdy (African american) males overlook pretty African American ladies?" - Nerdy African males are quite few and far between. Also, I think you meant "Why DO nerdy (african american) males overlook..."

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    • didn't meant to thumbs down... new user. But there are more than you think! There are a lot in college! but i get what you're saying. Thanks!

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    • Well if thats the case, how is it that they can date other girls? And for me, its not that matter of shyness... I literally get overlooked. Its funny, ill stare in a guys eye to see if he'll make eye contact and he tries his hardest not to look at me :( lol its pitiful!

    • If that's the case, it's because they are not attracted to you. Guys, no matter how shy, will always look at a girl they find attractive. You'll eventually find someone who is attracted to you and nerdy.

  • I don't think it's you personally they don't like. They're probably just shy and would rather approach someone who seems more like them. I don't wear glasses, but I'm pretty nerdy and definitely shy. If I avoid a girl, it's probably out of shyness.

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    • Thanks for the comment, but it still doesn't explain why they are so comfortable with girls who aren't black. its a little insulting when a nerdy guy can talk to any other girl, but not me :( Like why get shy over me but brave enough to approach someone else? it just seems unfair.

    • Maybe something about you is intimidating. Or it could be that they aren't into black women because of the stereotype you were talking about.

  • Nerdy and socially awkward guys are normally very introverted and shy, i suggest you approach them if you find them attractive the reason only althetic and "cool" guys approach you is because they are confident. Im sure nerdy guys find you attractive but they are scared of rejection or think that you are out of there league.

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  • Express even the slightest interest in something they do and they'll be all over you lol, the possibility of you liking them probably hasn't even occurred to them. Not to stereotype, but your taste in men is kinda unique... like a unicorn :)

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    • ahah i know!! smh I've been like this all my life. Thanks!

    • No worries, happy hunting :). If you need an icebreaker, ask them if they prefer AMD or Intel lol

  • Nerdy guys don't approach pretty girls because they believe they will automatically get rejected.

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  • cuz there's no black chicks in anime i guess.

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    • lol!!! hahah!! That may be true! lol jkjkjk

What Girls Said 1

  • there are a lot of nerdy guys who are attracted to pretty girls, they just think u wouldn't date them. if ur pretty then like u said u would get approached by the cool guys and athletes. nerds tend to be at the bottom compared to those guys, so they have this mistrust and insecurity that u dont want them. they wish they could have pretty girls but know that most pretty girls dont want them.

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