When a guy just doesn't get the hint and you don't want to be mean?

I met a nice guy recently but I am fresh off a bad breakup, so I am not looking to get involved with anyone right now. I explained it to him very nicely, told him it wasn't personal and that I am not emotionally available right now. He agreed and asked if we could stay in touch. Despite telling him this, he texts me constantly, gets possessive and jealous, calls me "baby" and keeps talking about waiting for me until I'm ready. I've talked to him a few times but he doesn't get it! I am getting very annoyed and don't want to be mean. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • He's showing who he is. He doesn't listen, is not considerate of your already clearly stated needs, and is just plain being selfish. If you must be mean to make him listen, then do so. You can try ONE MORE TIME to remind him of where you're at, and if he keeps on, blast him. He really seems wrapped up in what he wants.

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    • You got it, he's being selfish and doing what he wants despite what I've asked of him. Someone like this may be scary if I let this continue, he could end up harassing or stalking me.

    • Exactly, he could end up being that.

What Guys Said 8

  • You might be sending mixed signals somehow. But regardless, if he isn't getting the hint, then stop hinting. Hints are confusing. He can't read your mind. Just be direct and say what you have to say, no hints, no softening, no euphemisms, just get straight to the point in clear terms. Just clearly say "NO, I am not interested in you. I am NOT your baby. You are wasting your time waiting until I'm ready because I'm never going to be ready."

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  • Straight up bitch at him and tell him to fuck off or you'll block his ass… He's gonna keep bugging you and acting ass desperate unless you put your foot down

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  • block his phone. This can turn into something very ugly. He can be a stalker. He is listening to you but not hearing you. He only is thinking of what he wants. Get away NOW

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  • Drop the hammer on his ass. You may not want to be mean but tip toeing around isn't doing either of you any favors.

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    • Couldn't say it better myself

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    • Not sure why that last paragraph got all fucked so here it is again.

      If he doesn't understand that you don't like him that means to him you probably like him. You are leading him on without meaning to. Cut the cord for his sake at least and be done with it.

    • You're right. I actually did like him when I first met him but now he's really turning me off. I will be firm with him or else he may go psycho on me if I let it continue.

  • start ignoring his texts and phone calls don't initiate contact

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  • I agree with what everyone else is saying but maybe just because I'm a nice person I'd give him the benefit of the doubt and just strait up ask him why he's constantly calling you "baby" and texting you when you told him you're not available. If he says because he likes you just reitterate that you're not available if he continues it's time to cut him off.

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  • Whatever they say, ignoring is not good. Tell him you don't see him as dating material or whatever.

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  • If you are not mean to him, it means that you are not annoyed yet

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What Girls Said 1

  • I know you don't want to hurt his feeling but I bet if you curse his ass out he will get the full picture lol or you can stop responding to him

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