Why guys not approaching girls?

so long story short.. basically am pretty, have good job, friends, don't lack guys attention, smile. Approachable. Popular! However..

i see millions guys at work, but they all just looking at me smiling-but never approach for some reason. some say 'hi' some talk, some nothing. I don't bite! haa. I approached a few. we talked, but then they seem disappear. They sort of looking first when they see me, judging maybe whether to say hi or not.. walk away without saying anything.. why guys do it?

or maybe they already know somehow that there won't be anything with her (me), she looks cheeky, she is out of my league, she (me) high maitenance for me etc?

Updates:
I JUST ASK A QUESTION... THERE IS SEEM TO BE A LITTLE BATTLEFIELD GOING! NO ONE NEEDS TO BE PERSONAL! NO NEED TO COMMENT ON PERSONAL STUFF AS YOU DON'T KNOW ME AND I DON'T YOU. TA

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Most Helpful Guy

  • i basically don't approach girls because i feel they need to be constantly praised or need to be told a joke every 2 minutes proving that i have sense of humour or more like i don't wanna compete with a douche bag who seems eyeing her for last 1 hour with a open mouth or she is gonna be rude and lots of things , so far in my life I've experienced modern women are like satisfied just by attention, i got loads of girls numbers saved in my mobile which are of no use, asked their names with only them acting like they are not interested in knowing the opposite person name, they just make it harder cause they assume guy has do every damn thing and chase them and i said screw up with their expectation, it's better to take care of myself then being dumb and

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What Guys Said 19

  • What makes you think this has anything to do with you? What makes you think it has anything to do with "approaching" which implies hitting on you?

    People in a work situation usually talk to a limited number of people. Not all of them are going to be you. Sorry, but the way you word this question makes it seem like you think you are so desirable that every guy within sight should come running up begging for your attention.

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    • no i only meant that a lot of guys just looking and smiling all the time.. come ant talk. and yes, i don't lack attention!!! coz i am. i know i am

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    • +1 DanAG

    • hahaaah relax and have a sense of humour you old man hehe!

  • I can't tell if you mean that you work with lots of guys, or you come across a lot of different guys while you're at work (like if you're a cashier or waitress or something). Anyway, just because guys nice looks girls doesn't mean they'll automatically approach. Some will, but most of the time there needs to be some kind of way of breaking the ice, or coming up with a way to start a conversation. And many, many guys are horrible at starting conversation. So a lot of times they'll just take a nice glance, and then keep on moving. It's nothing personal about you.

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  • Guys are afraid of the hot girl. Guys are always trying to increase our social clout and the hot, popular girl has enough social credibility to hurt their station. At least that's what they think.

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  • i agree with DanAG. Stop making assumptions and these feelings that just because you are an "attractive girl", there is something wrong with guys for not dropping everything that they are doing to approach you for a date. If a guy is peaking your interest, then you can make the first move and approach first. If you can't do that, then fine. But don't ask of things from other people that you refuse to do yourself

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    • i did.. didn't lead to anywhere, that's why i believe man should approach a woman first!. i don't know what goes in guys mind.. therefore asked.

  • Long story short... They don't have the guts.

    Solution: Send them the amount of signs which could even attract a tree. Wink them, bite your lip slightly, so they REALLY get that you're flirting with them. If they see you around and you're always smiling they might think you're just nice, since most men have no idea of body language cues. Advantage for those who have ;)

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    • hah did all that.. so should i come and say:hey dude are you blind or what?

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    • Like, only winking at them ;)
      Yeah, sorry for you that you look so good that you intimidate men.. And that there are so many insecure men out there.. Oh well, more beauties left for the secure ones ;)

    • haaa.. well i winked and smiled.. nothing helped!

  • I approach all the time if they seem friendly and interested. Some girls look intimidating and you maybe one of them.

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    • intimidating in what way? bad?

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    • well if you don't know a girl.. you don't know if he is mean etc if you don't give a chance and speak to her!

    • You're right, but if you just don't look approachable then I instantly think there is no point. If you looked at me and smiled then I would.

  • we do approach. women of this era are not polite about it. they're actually downright terrible. so we stop, given that we don't actually appreciate being looked down upon for showing the slightest bit of interest.

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  • well do you want the truth? In my experience it is because the girl is not as hot as she thinks she is.. just my opinion, maybe you are hot but that is my experience

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  • why girls not approach guys?

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    • maybe because its guys job!

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    • @Forca these girls always get approached from time to time.

    • you shall answer it. or maybe let us guys see if you look intimidating, hot, not, or just look funny (why guys smile). I can't give you advice this way. I can give you options and open your mind as much as you let me

  • It's because guys are insecure and won't make a move unless they are COMPLETELY sure they stand a chance, they probably think you're out of their league

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  • It's probably because most people don't like shitting where they eat if you understand?

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    • no.. what that suppose to be?

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    • I gotcha.

    • I approach women, but if I think a woman is high maintenance I'll stay away from her.

  • WE'RE SCARED!!! D:

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  • afraid for rejection...

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  • You should message me den ua questions ll change:D

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  • i wish i could be younger again because of this unfortuneately

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    • because i wish i took action earlier to overcome approach anxiety and work on my social-skills, conversation-skills, confidence, flirting-skills, attractiveness so i could get a girlfriend earlier, obviously i still haven't had a girlfriend yet and it sucks i'm not getting any younger

    • I feel too old to be inexperienced

  • because guys are really not supposed to approach, guys are rejected and girls are usually not rejected so based on that its the girl who supposed to approach because girls follow different rules and are way more picky than guys, and some guys already know they are not wanted by girls so they dont bother them, guys "approach" girls in a non-obvious way called the non-approach routine, they show interest by completely ignoring the girl and/or looking/glancing at her a lot it just depends on the type of guy he is, and shyness and confidence level, they just wait till a girl wants him, cause thats how its done, some guys will talk to a girl cause those guys are players or naturally outgoing and are confident, but ether way when a girl doesn't reciprocate and show interest back thats when a guy disappears, cause we read into things and see it as rejection, guys are not going to "make" a girl interested in him or decide things for her, cause thats just not how it works

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  • "or maybe they already know somehow that there won't be anything with her (me), she looks cheeky, she is out of my league, she (me) high maitenance for me etc? "

    You answered your own question. :)

    That and the work place is a terrible place for men to meet women. If a guy flirts with a female co-worker and things go south, she could go to his boss and say he sexually harassed her. Instant trip to the unemployment line.

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  • What's wrong with telling a guy flat out that you like them? Men nowadays have been holding women to the equality that they claim to be all about. When most (BUT NOT ALL WOMEN) women think of equality, they only care about the equality that they can benefit from and they don't want equality in dating even though its one sided and unfair.

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  • guys dont approach girls so much these days

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    • what the reason? even if they like or think girl is pretty?

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    • haha. Mostly masculine hobbies and work.

    • haha.. are you interested in romance?

What Girls Said 2

  • this s a really good question, that I as well as many other girls want an answer to, unfortunately there is no straight answer and there could be a plethora of reasons as to why they don't approach, but 2 main reasons I've heard from guys are: they are afraid of being rejected, or you don't seem approachable enough to go up to.

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  • You seem. cocky and a bit like I am. so hot why are guys not all over me. It screams attention
    Seeker guys can smell that a mile off. you need to be more humble and chilled. An why would you date a guy you work with what if you split. Meet guys. in other places..

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    • i am not seeking a guy or a relationship.. you can split with anyone..

    • I mean wanting a guy to drool or be all over you etc. Yeah but you would have to see them at work. Its different to splitting with guy outside of there. As you can erase him.

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