Could you date someone who lives in a dirty house?

I'm dating a man I really like. He is a professional and makes a decent salary. However, his bathrooms are dirty, he has stuff strewn about, and the house itself is a bit worn down. No closet in the master bedroom, no curtains on the windows. My friends say I should picture myself living like that and decide if I want to keep dating him. I feel like that is shallow, but at the same time I wouldn't want to live that way. As a relationship develops, can these things be worked out? Or is it a bad sign of some deeper issue? I really like him and he's a great guy.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Being he is a 'Date' for now And not a "mate,' you really don't have much choice in the matter, unless you either Accept it for what it is and how he lives, give him his walking papers because it's "Just too much' Or----Pick up a cleaning cloth and go behind him. And of course, I don't think you would want to Start That 'Bad habit.'
    For now, for you are saying you 'Really like' him, close your eyes and deal with it. And if anything changes in the "Romance department,' where you have both decided to set up shop, Then you have every right as a soul mate to be a Straw boss, lay down a few Ground rules, telling him that-----I Will Not live this way, babe.
    Yes, I do believe with a guy who is Not Mr. Clean that when a good woman comes into his life, he can be changed And----Will rearrange----If he wants to keep the fires going, keep her in his life and satisfied And-------Will bend over backwards with a broom to keep the honeymoon from being swept under the carpet.
    Good luck. xx

    • "... bend over backwards with a broom to keep the honeymoon from being swept under the carpet." Clever! So well written. Thanks for your answer and for making me laugh. ;)

    • lol... I love the pun for fun, but try to get to the point.. You're so very welcome, glad we both can have a few laughs tonite..:)) xx


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What Guys Said 3

  • On one hand, I feel maybe his place and his life just needs a woman's touch. Then on the other I feel he is a dirty person that I would not want to live with. House hold chores should be shared, not one sided. I would fear you would be the only one doing all the cleaning and that is not fair. So in the end, I would try it out, but probably bail quicker than normal if things did not improve.

  • A sign of laziness and poor hygiene..

  • Watch what happens over the next few weeks. I bet he starts cleaning up, repairing broken things and placing the right cabinets and stuff in places.

    Most men do not live to the same standards as a woman until there is a potential woman inbound.


What Girls Said 2

  • My bff in high school was an all-A student & in a lot of leadership positions. ..& her family's house was filthy. But it was the privacy of their own home, & they didn't have to let me come over. You learn to look past it, & you grow somewhat grateful that they're putting their modesty aside to allow you to share their private space with them.

  • It could be either due to laziness and/or ADHD? Or the person is a hoarder? Doesn't like cleaning or doesn't have much time to organize, possibly not great with balancing his time.