I've been hurt so much I can't even be in a relationship anymore. Don't think I can ever love again?

And it's things I can't even control anymore.
I used to be really fun and flirty, now I won't even dare look at a guy. I used to attract a lot of guys and I would have fun and flirt back but now that I've been hurt so much I keep to myself a lot. I tried breaking out of it but I just can't. I guess I'm too scared to hurt again.

I still attract men but I just can't even talk to them. I'll be kind of rude and I'll sabotage things on purpose so that they'll stop talking to me.

Because I used to be really funny and friendly, a lot of guys mistakenly took this as me being promiscuous. And I mistakenly took their interest as wanting a relationship or wanting to be with me. So I'd fall in love and they would only want sex and I'd end up really hurt.

I just can't do this anymore but I don't want to be lonely anymore. How do I move on from all of my past hurt?

Last time I fell in love I actually believed it was for real but it wasn't. It was with my best friend. He said lots of things to lead me on and I believed him, but I found out he only wanted to have sex with me and only pretended to be my best friend. Out of all my relationships that was the most hurtful.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I mean, crap happens :/ There are a lot of terrible people out there who use and take advantage of others but not everyone does.. You have to stay guarded enough not to get hurt by jerks but open enough to meet a nice guy. Balance is the key.

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    • yah I guess I'm having trouble finding that balance. But maybe it's just too recent still from what happened with my friend.

    • Not really. He hurt you, you can't change that but you CAN refuse to put any more emotions into that silly little man :/ Honestly, it's easier than you think when you realize that he's a loser and doesn't deserve the time or emotions you've put into him.. let that sink in a minute.. Ya see? Just let it go!.. it's counterproductive to dwell on it.. we all get duped sometimes.. lesson learned ;) Have a good cry and move on :) I hope you find a real best friend! and a nice guy!

    • lol thanks I hope so too

What Guys Said 2

  • time heals wounds

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  • well the problem is girls always go for player jerks instead of nice guys, and this is what happens to them, so dont blame guys for your downfall, blame yourself instead, and hear me out on this: players make moves and are very confident outgoing guys, who know how to manipulate girls with there tricks, nice guys are usually shy and dont approach girls, they wait for the girl to approach, they are clingy and desperate, and respectful so if you want a guy who will love you go for the nice guys and approach them too, dont wait for a nice guy to approach you cause they dont do that, and most of all dont be making or expecting guys to do everything cause it doesn't work that way, unless you want to end up with a player again whos going to hurt you

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    • My best friend was a nice guy though. He was so shy I thought he tried to just be friends because he didn't have the courage to approach me. That's why I'm so confused now. He was a nice guy really shy, he was really clingy. He was respectful up to a certain point. Once he found out I liked him he started to disrespect me. It's just so confusing now to know who is a good guy and who isn't.

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    • I did show interest and eventually I told him how I felt cus I figured he was really shy. But then once he knew I liked him he all of a sudden wasn't so shy anymore and started talking really dirty to me. He basically acted like he could have sex with me at any time just b/c I told him I liked him. It made me feel horrible

    • every guy wants sex thats normal, its not disrespectful to talk dirty tho it can be excessive at times with some guys, give a guy a break, we are desperate, just as much as we are desperate to be loved and wanted by a girl, but some guys can be jerks and are players and not all guys are like that

What Girls Said 0

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