Why am I so unfortunate in the dating world?

Well, I just need to let this out. I was crushing on a girl and she didn't feel the same so our friendship will more than likely drift apart. This has happened to be before and its been getting me down. I think I may have too high of standards, always seems to be very attractive girls that do this to me, but they are good friends and sweet and make me feel like the bad guy for not wanting to be just "long term friends". I want a relationship with love and marriage kids and all that good stuff, its just so hard for a shyguy like me to find.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You have to know what your ultimate goal is... You say that you want marriage and kids but you also say you go for hot girls.

    First, hot girls love nice guys because hot girls are hot because they eat attention. If we don't get enough attention our hotness starts to decay so we need nice guys like you to like us and give us attention and tell us we're nice and pretty. .. ok that's over dramatic but you get the idea.

    As far as being friends NO NO NO being friends is for your early 20s until you realize its bs. As long as you're kind and honest there's nothing wrong with not being just friends and walking away to find that wife of yours.

    Ok more to why this is a little your fault. .. You want wife n kids yes? Then why do you waste your time with girls that don't want that. hot girls are always great to look at and sometimes great to marry but don't waste your time with ones that don't like you. Move on. Instead of first looking for a hot girl, look for a wife that will be a good mother and you're attracted to. Maybe she'll like you back

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    • That's what I look for. This girl was great with kids and wanted the same thing, big reason she became my crush.

    • She sounds ok. If she really was that sweet though she wouldn't hang out with a guy that likes her when she doesn't like him back. That's not nice or mature. It's selfish. She's probably not bad, just immature. Move on. You're young find one that likes you back

    • you described the stereotype of a hot girl. not all attractive/hot girls are like that. she can be hot and not the stereotype.

What Girls Said 6

  • A lot of times we base our self esteem on whether or not someone likes us, especially if someone seems unattainable. It becomes a challenge. The biggest turn on is for you to be confident, independent and moving on with your life. Still, you could do all those things and she may still not see you as more than a friend. But trust me - show her that you are not needy and you'll have a better chance of her being interested in you.

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  • you will find her... and she will be one of the lucky ones. dont ever give up. God will bring her into your life when the time is right. x

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  • Just be patient you'll find someone - or go out, change ur dressing style and hang out with friends you'll pick someone up - I'm sure because I gave the same advice to a friend and now he is dating but the horrible man has forgotten me :(

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  • Do you eat your boogers? Shy guys tend to have antisocial behaviors like eating their boogers or clicking pens all of the time. You could just be in the friendzone...

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  • Othr factors could be responsible. Like u show urslf as too desperate (which gals hate), or under confidence or maybe u demand long term relationship directly without giving time to gal to understand u. She may run away if y sound too possessive abut initiating serious relationship in just few chats. Just dont fall for beauty. Look at her nature please

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    • I show little desperation. I never tried to get into a series relationship after a few chats, I always take things slow, maybe too slow that I just get friend zoned...

    • Mayb u chose wrong gal... Keep trying. And ya u get freind zoned cas mayb gals take u for granted. If u feel u r friend zoned, firmly tell her u dont wanna b her just friend... Dont be always "too nice" guy. When u date a gal, be her great friend but remind her u dont wanna be her just friend and ya socialise. Join activities, clubs etc so u can meet like minded gals. Enjy dating

  • There are certain guys with a lot of girl friends and complain about being friend zoned.
    Think of it in reverse. The girls with a ton of guy friends, are usually seen as "one of the guys"
    It's not much different, you've just become "one of the girls"
    Stop hanging out with so many girls!

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    • I don't hang out with that many girls! I'm a introverted person.

    • In my experience though, guys I've met who have girl friends always end up as my friend, and see them as nothing more than that. I think it's just certain types of behaviour, because most of my guy friends are similar to each other.
      I don't know what it is, but some guys are easy for girls to be friends with, and other guys you don't want to be friends with.
      I think it's how they start off when getting to know you or something.

What Guys Said 4

  • d00d I think you will find her just keep trying. don't ever give up man and keep your standards. my standards are high as fuck too but I wouldn't have it any other way cause they're mine:P hahaa. just remember, she's coming as fast as she can, you just have to be patient.

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  • Sometimes girls just need friends. If you're in a lookout for a relationship, let her know it from the start, if she's not interested. she'll say so. Also, friendship will eventually be established if you don't break the touch barrier. Touch her, flirt with her, let her know you care for her and are also interested in her romantically. Play it right and you'll watch your life change. Good Luck :)

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  • I often contemplate my misfortune too, but then I am fast becoming a glass is half-full man and soon realise that fortune may well be awaiting for me around the very next corner.

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    • Yea, I normally do as well, but this is becoming a pattern

    • We're in the same boat pal, but never lose hope and keep on marching through the marsh land, we'll get to our destination eventually.

  • take your time mate, relax and enjoy her company either as a Friend or a lover, well, a bit of flirting and sense of humor will help.

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