Have you ever been single for so long that?

When you do finally get contact with a potential partner, you flee out of pure fear of this new type of interaction? Because I recently had a chance to go out with a girl, all of the signs that she wanted me to kiss her, and I got up in my head and my thought line pretty much went:

"She wants you to kiss her do it, wait how long has it been since I last..., oh god its been half a fucking decade, I think I forgot how to kiss, oh my god what if I forgot how to tell if she really wants me to kiss her, well look at her no matter how you kiss her its going to be a let down she's gorgeous and you're you, shit what if I forgot how to have sex"

That was an all time low in my recently restarted dating life and I just have to ask if anyone else has ever been alone for so long that they are afraid to make it happen even when they have the chance out of fear?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, I have. From 18-22 (the best years of a young man's life) I was single and not by choice. Getting back into the game was not easy, in fact it could have happened sooner but as you mentioned, the sense of fear is overwhelming.

    My sources of insecurity are a bit different from yours, though. I find myself physically repulsive and if a girl ever got to know my body, she would leave me in disgust. In fact, that fear is still prevalent as I haven't had a relationship last longer than 3 months since the age of 17. That's 7 years and counting.

    At this point you can either face the fear or let it control you... I'm currently working on not only facing the fear, but destroying it.

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What Girls Said 2

  • yep been single for 22 years... get it all the time now. i just try and say im nervous so he doesn't expect much

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  • PAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA yeah. In my head I play the game cool and smooth, but when it comes down to it scary experiences will flash back and I dont want to play anymore.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I know how you feel. You're basically starting all over with experience when you've forgotten. You just have to take chances and hope for the best. Kind of like having a second first kiss. Some girls will even be understanding of this. However it turns out for you, good luck

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