Is he going to text me again? What should I do?

I had a great first date with a guy I met. After that we kept texting each other, altough I was the one who always texted first (he only texted first three times). Last week we made plans to hang out but he said he was going to be out of town so he will text me on Friday to confirm. He didn't, so at Saturday afternoon I texted him to ask if we were still going out, but he said he was still out of town and he was sorry.
On Monday I texted him again and we talked, that day we decided to hang out again last wednesay night. But 30 minutes before our date he texted me saying he was still at work and he was not going to be able to make it. He said he was sorry and said "let's do it another day". I said I understand and I told him it was ok.
But today I couldn't stop thinking if maybe there was something wrong. So I asked him if he really wants to hang out with me someday and what does he want.
This is what he told me: "first of all I don't have any problem to hang out with you. And second, it scares me all the trouble and movies you make up in your mind. relax, there's nohing wrong. I just haven't had time, that's all. But I don't like you questioning me like that."
So I answered "about the first thing: that's good to know. I thought that maybe you don't want to hang out with me and that's why you cancelled twice. About the second thing: I'm not making movies in my mind. I just thought it was weird, and I decided to ask you if there was something wrong instead of making assumptions... and I'm sorry about the questioning thing, I didn't mean to bother you, it won't happen again... so do you forgive me and everything is fine?"
He said "yes, relax".

It was the end of the conversation!! I don't know if he is going to text me again. I really like this guy, so what should I do?

Updates:
Did I scare him off? Do you think I still have a chance with this guy?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If a girl that I kind of like but not really sure either way. How he is treating you , is the way I would treat her. The fact he said or used the word SCARES is not a good sign and it tells me he clearly has no problem finding dates as he is comparing you to the other girls and how they react to similar situations. He's kind of planted the seed or idea in your head that you've scared him away guys sometimes do this is an easy way out instead of having to be the bad guy or prick by not wanting another date a guy will lead you to believe that it's you in the wrong that's why he left or is no keen ( I've actually done it myself in my younger days as a boy but I'm a man now and know that's not tHE way to handle it) What worries me is the cancellations , Like yes cancel but if you're working late you know well before 30 mins before the date. That makes me think someone else is in the picture. As in my younger days I did exactly the same thing except 4 times to the poor girl broke her heart she was so upset. I was prick back then but I've learned from those mistakes. Sounds to me like he doesn't value you and trying to win him back probably won't happen as you never really had him in the first place ! Sorry if that's harsh but straight up there's a guy out there some place that will treat you good my advice look for that guy..

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What Guys Said 8

  • Alright sweetie, you asked for my help, you got it... now listen up.

    First the truth and hard cold fact- This guy is totally not into you and he knows you are totally into him. You are already put aside as a "rainy day booty call" but other than that, all avenues are shut and closed. In a nutshell, yes you fucked up and no he is not going to text you again, unless, the well runs dry.

    Take 5 mins, read ^ over n over till you get it through your head, accept it, I know its difficult...

    Now, on to the solution- Before I give you the solution I will tell you this, can I help you get this guy back? Most likely yes, as long as you follow my lead to the T. Will it be worth it? No, because he will end up dumping you because he has already decided you're desperate for him and crazy, he has you and will always have you, men love a chase, so he will always need the thrill.

    So you tell me, knowing this, what do you wanna do? In my honest opinion, I would suggest moving on because its not worth it, but I have known plenty of men/women who dont stop till they break their own heart, so its your call..

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    • I really like this guy. What can I do to get him back? Please tell me.

    • Inspite of knowing the end result will still be you getting dumped? Okay your call, I just don't want you to live in the illusion that once you have him you will be able to change things, because you can never change what already happened and in his mind, you are already clingy and needy, nothing will change that... I just want you to know that.

  • Hmm.. Well, he may ACTUALLY be busy. It sucks to cancel on a girl but we have to make priorities and stuff. If you're not his girlfriend and he has to stay at work to help out the low man power, then yes he'll cancel. I think what you should do is simply ask him what his schedule looks like, and make him plan out the date. If he doesn't know what his schedule is, tell him to find out, if he can't or doesn't then you have tried too hard and he isn't into you. Make him prove that he actually cares but you have to prove that you care too; have you asked him to talk about his day? Be there for him because he might be really stressed.

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    • Should I text him to see how he is? It doesn't matter we had that unpleasant conversation only a few hours ago? It won't make him think that I'm suffocating?

    • I'm not sure how to reply to your opinion or if I even can, BUT definitely give him some space since you had such a conversation so recently. Text him tomorrow morning saying good morning but don't expect him to text back. Then in the afternoon simply ask how he's doing.

  • I honestly think he's not all that interested, and that you should move on to someone else.

    Him texting you only 30 minutes before your date in order to cancel just goes to show that you're not a priority for him. Add that to the fact that he didn't initiate all that much, and he also blew you off by not messaging you when he said he would, and it just sounds like someone who doesn't really care.

    Just consider it a favor that he's exposed himself early like this rather than leading you on, and go find someone better. :-)

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  • "movies you make up in your mind. "?
    You didn't go on and on about chick flics I hope.
    ", I didn't mean to bother you, it won't happen again... so do you forgive me and everything is fine?"
    Sounds kinda clingy.

    Alright, so he didn't text you friday, he didn't text you saturday, he didn't text you sunday/monday.
    He only texted you 30 minutes before the date when you've probably done hours of prep shit, he didn't say "lets do it in an hour or two?, or tomorrow" he just said yeah can't make it, don't care you did all this shit, bye.

    He sounds like he's not interested if he doesn't even make an effort to text you and if you think someone finds you clingy, texting them again is just going to make it worse.

    Without question you shouldn't text him for a number of reasons.
    Now you also should just forget about him even if he does text, if he can't even respond when he says he will and shows no interest in you he's not worth it.

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  • Usually it's a good sign when the person that cancels offers to reschedule, though I'm not crazy about how he never texts or calls first. And he seems to have a poor attitude the way he was lecturing you. Bottom line, he canceled twice and I hate excuses early on in dating so I think you should cut contact with him. Let him text you, which I doubt he will, and you should date other guys.

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  • First thing you need to do is BREATH... relax. You don't have a reason to question his intentions right now, & you appearing to be very insecure from his point of view. I get it, you like this guy, but you don't want to push if he has business to tend to. Wait a day or two. Focus on things you need to do for yourself. And if he doesn't contact you again, don't sweat it. There's another around the corner just waiting to ask you out.

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    • Thank you... Just one question: you say I should wait a day or two, but if he doesn't text me in that time should I text him? Or should I just forget about him?

    • I say forget him. Sweetie, don't put your life on hold for someone you barely know, when chances are a good man you haven't met yet is just a smile away. Never settle, & don't allow your own fears get in the way. Enjoy your life, hon. You only get one.

  • Well happened to me. Your panicing and ur showing it. Advice. Realize you may or maynot have a point. But blowing off lime that. Well dear think about it. Are u gonna go over the old yeller house I wouldn't. So you got a conundrum.

    I say plead insanity. Or look my cat got hyjacked by three transexual notzi Eskimo from 3 mile island. So u were felling a bit aggressive.

    Lol in other words damage control then be nice. But eyes open!

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    • I understood your answer. I get it: I messed it up... but what should i do now to fix it?

    • Go surprise him like bring him lunch. Should do the trick. little note. Yeah know

  • If he doesn't text you again. He doesn't deserve you.

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    • But I think that maybe I scared him off or maybe he is mad at me beacuse of the questioning. What should I do? Should I text him again? I really like him and I don't want to lose him. What should I do to make him text me again?

    • Wait a day or two

What Girls Said 1

  • He's not interested, you need to stop waiting for him

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