When is the right time to tell your boyfriend that you are bisexual?

I do not have a boyfriend yet, but when I do get a boyfriend, when should I let him know that I am attracted to girls too? I would never cheat on him with a girl; but I think it would be fair for him to know that I have that attraction to females as well. So when should I bring this up when dating a guy?

  • Before you start dating
    33% (5)50% (5)40% (10)Vote
  • On the first or second date
    20% (3)20% (2)20% (5)Vote
  • After a few dates
    7% (1)30% (3)16% (4)Vote
  • When he asks to go steady with you
    27% (4)0% (0)16% (4)Vote
  • After you have been going steady for a while
    13% (2)0% (0)8% (2)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
He's a Christian, by the way.
I don't think he would personally be bothered by it, but I also know it's not considered right in Christianity.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • When you're ready for him to dump you.

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    • Wow. So you would dump your girlfriend if you found out she was bisexual? Why?

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    • That's correct so go ahead and tell him :)

    • Ok thanks :)

What Guys Said 13

  • If it will create difficulty with his family.. it will likely cause tension with him as well, regardless of his personal attitude toward bisexuality.

    So it would be unfair to conceal it until you 're an official couple. If it means losing him, it will be the less painful the earlier he knows about it

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    • Thank you for a well-thought answer
      I believe you're right

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    • I hope I can too

    • It's not like a choice; I've tried to not be attracted to girls but I just am

  • when you start talking together about sexuality, about intimate subjects.

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  • "He's a Christian, by the way.
    I don't think he would personally be bothered by it, but I also know it's not considered right in Christianity"

    Neither is sex before marriage, and how many Christian are virgins when married?

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    • Haha, I see your point.
      He and I are both virgins and saving ourselves for marriage.

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    • I am a virgin.
      I only ever made out before - so I am not innocent, but technically a virgin.

      I had some spiritual encounters.

    • Do you wanna share those spiritual encounters?

  • The earlier you tell them, the less serious they would take the relationship. However there are a small group of men that it would bother if they'd knew.

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  • I'd be glad to hear it any time. Basically it raises my chances to have a MFF threesome.

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  • After a few dates. Before you are serious, but after you first meet would be best.

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    • Ok thanks :)
      I am hoping to date a guy that I've been acquainted with for years - does this change things at all? We're not good friends because I've always been guy-shy and he's always been girl-shy, but we have many common interests and beliefs and have had a few intellectual discussions.

    • Not really. At least you being a bisexual won't likely matter. Getting out of the friendzone is probably your bigger challenge.

    • Well the few times I've seen him recently, he's been showing signs of liking me. Which is why I'm starting to hope that maybe he is finally seeing me as more than a friend.

  • Do you act on the attraction to girls?

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    • I have in the past but I don't anymore

    • I don't worry about it unless it gets brought up. My wife has a slight attraction to girl and I dint find out till after marriage. So it don't matter.

  • He would be a lucky guy becz
    He can have 3 way and you'll be enjoying it too

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  • Thats actually a turn on

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    • Haha thanks
      Is it only a turn on in the sense of there being a possibility of a threesome, or is it a turn on in other ways too?

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    • Those "wild factors" make you hotter, And also threesome factors, too..

    • Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you 🙊
      Ok thanks :)

  • Right now so he can get that 3some!

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    • No threesomes for me, thank you

  • After you dump him/ he dumps you.
    If he's ok with it... lol i pity the fool.

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  • No such thing as bi

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    • ass ...

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    • Thanks @neisch

    • no problem. i know it for a fact XD damn i was worried that i was fake and didn't know i myself existed...

  • why should it matter? as long as you aren't cheating on him with other women than it's all good.

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    • Good point. Thanks :)

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    • that's one thing I don't understand about hardcore religious people. it should be about caring for other people and understanding but it seems at least for the hard core ones it's more about being close minded.

      my family are Christians but we are fairly open minded maybe because we don't go to church. :P

    • Yeah...
      Good for you :)

What Girls Said 6

  • I'd say when he wants to go steady with you... that way it's very clear that you love him and aren't looking for a way out... if you show you're still interested in him exclusively, your sexual orientation will just seem like a tiny quirk

    ... hopefully he's not the jealous type though... otherwise your social life could get a little dramatic, lol

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    • Haha I hadn't thought of that. Guys normally freak out at their girlfriends hanging out with guys - maybe a guy would freak out at his bisexual girlfriend hanging out with men or women.

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    • that's sad... hugging's a basic human thing... well, maybe not so much between guys, lol

    • some secrets aren't so terrible though. when you get in a relationship with someone, i imagine most of your more intimate moments aren't discussed with random strangers afterwards

      and i think that's true with most people in the world... so no biggie there :)

  • I didn't mention it until it was relevant. He made a joke about me hooking up with a chick ans I just said "I already have". He asked a few questions and was a bit surprised but didn't care. That was after we had been dating about 8 months lol.

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    • So just mention it when the topic comes up. Makes sense. Thanks :) But if the topic never comes up naturally...

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    • He doesn't have to share it with them lol

    • Yeah true haha
      Thanks

  • in my opinion i would say wait until you know for sure that he likes you for yourself me myself am bisexual i waited as well cause some men will take advantage of that just to be with two women at once so if you confirmed that he like u for u then tell him cause he maybe love you even more for it.

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    • Thank you, that's good advice :)
      He would never want a threesome, he's not that kind of guy.

  • I'm a Christian, it depends on his tolerance.
    I'd tell him though just to be safe.

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  • I think maybe before you date.

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  • It doesn't really matter. So whenever you feel like it, I guess? :)

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