We're not officially dating but I want to break up?

I've been seeing this guy for a month or two now and it's been lovely but I'm just over it. We've dated, hung out and fooled around a little but I just don't want it to go any further. We were sorta friends beforehand though and I'd like to still be able to stay in touch after, I break it off. I just don't know how to do this. How do you break up with someone you're only sorta dating? If possible I'd like to avoid the slow fade as that usually results in unnecessary hurt feelings.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Its a tough situation and i get why you're feeling tentative, its hard to stop sort of dating someone you're not really dating but do have a history of friend ship with,

    would just tell him id like to go back to how things were, just be friends. keep it direct and simple so he's not confused or holds any false hope but is not hurt or insulted by unnecessary detail.

    After he understands unequivocally you JUST want to be friends, tell him though you want to remain friends you understand he may not want to and or may just need some time... Then give him all the space he needs to move on.

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What Guys Said 3

  • just tell him straight up, it's the hardest thing to do but it truly is for the best of the both of you. If he can't respect that then ignore him, but from someone who's been in the position of the other, just ignoring texts and such prolongs the whole process and makes it so much harder to move on, because we feel like we messed up or made you mad, and try to assume lack of interest as the last possible scenario.

    So yea it would be tough to do and he may react poorly, but it's like a band-aid, just rip it off quickly and save both of you the agony, depending on how invested he his, being friends right away may not be a great idea, but if you're up front about how you feel, then maybe down the line you can be friends again

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  • Fast and direct, like pulling off a band-aid. You have to be honest if you want any chance of maintaining a friendship. Make sure to give him space afterwards, as he could be upset. And definitely make sure you don't send any mixed signals, like still being flirty or drunk-dialing or anything afterwards, that'll make things so much worse.

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  • It might be easier on you if you started to limit your time alone together, and do things with other people as a group. If you do that for awhile, the idea would be for him to feel less attached to you as any kind of partner an therefore easier for you to express how you are feeling.

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What Girls Said 2

  • just dont show him interest as much anymore.. like dont reply to his texts for a couple of days and stuff. im sure he'll get the hint. I don't know but thats what i would do!

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    • She already said shed like to avoid the slow fade as its obnoxious and disrespectful-im paraphrasing.

    • It is one of the WORST things when girls do this, it just makes it so much harder on both parties involved

  • its gonna hurt... my friend did that to me... and i really can't get over..

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