This is abnormal in dating, right?

I get a common norm is to see multiple people and pick one to be exclusive with at some point.

I get that isn't weird for people. I personally wouldn't do it because I don't think it's fair to the guys I would be seeing.

The guy I was seeing said he wanted to date, then said he would date when he had time for me. Then he mentioned he didn't want to be exclusive right now, while also mentioning he had no time for any girl.

He confused me so I talked to him about it and he said he would see other people if he met someone he was more compatible with.

The entire time he was definitely trying to push my physical boundaries and I could tell he found me sexually appealing. He was aware the entire time that I did not want to sleep with him though.

Is it safe to say a guy who does things like this basically wants to sleep with me and not much else?

He would say things that made me think he cared but he didn't seem to have much interest in me when he couldn't physically be with me.

I get why people might not want to be exclusive right away, but what he did isn't normal right?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • "The guy I was seeing said he wanted to date, then said he would date when he had time for me. Then he mentioned he didn't want to be exclusive right now, while also mentioning he had no time for any girl."

    There is your answer right there. He is not really into you. He's full of shit and you need to accept that. Don't let him waste your time. You are just a back up he is trying to fuck. Go and find yourself a boyfriend who will really like you. This guy certainly doesn't. Trust me.

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    • That's what I thought, i felt he was trying to keep me as a prospect for sex. He made me feel so special though that I thought he wouldn't do that to me. But I guess he played me or something

What Guys Said 3

  • well what he did isn't right but it happens too often. that's dating though, you spread out all your eggs in different baskets, and some people prefer to put them all in 1 basket at a time. its really up to the individual which method works best for them. and yeah it sucks when 1 person is seeing multiple people while you're only looking forward to seeing just them.

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    • I get that people view dating differently. It's just that if you want to see several people tell me so I'm not confused. Dont make me think I'm the only one you want to date..

      He even spent two hours convincing me he wants a relationship with me. But still said we aren't exclusive, and claimed he did so for me so I wouldn't miss out on other guys.

      Mixed signals aren't ok in my opinion

    • yeah mixed signals suck, even worse then you don't get it lol. awkward... hahaa :D

  • To have engaged in all this interaction while you now state you never even wanted to have sex with him is coming across to him as deceptive and manipulative, and rightfully so. Basically your are asking him to 'post' to you one of these vapid rate me questions you see on GAG. He is far in advance of you in that he has learned to dismiss this kind of imbecility up front, but at the same time, that same region of his brain is not averse to toying with you. Your best bet for your own comfort is to abandon this thread and all inner contemplation associated with it.

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    • I know it's bad, I really do. I'm just so disturbed and just creeped out. He was the first person I trusted to date.. I don't know I'm very very bothered by my experience and I don't know how to handle it. I'm sure I sound crazy and over sensitive but it's really disturbing that someone I trusted would be trying to manipulate me the entire time I was with him

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    • ok maybe i misread.. but these comment are tightly connected to connected the original.. sorry

    • It's fine! I just really think you've got the wrong girl. I want to forget about this jerk as quick as I can and also learn from this so I can avoid a similar experience

  • normal meaning. people do it I think it's fine as long as u are not sleeping with any. people try to convince me otherwise but it's not happening

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What Girls Said 1

  • to me it sounds like he's leading you on or just wants the goods. sorry.

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    • Can't see why both aren't possible, unfortunately

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