To leave or not to leave?

Okay I have a question that I already asked but gonna ask differently.

I live here with my boyfriend I'm just turned 28 he is 59 I've lived with him for 5 years he is a photographer I myself don't work I have social anxiety and have been just recently. Been doing things to change that but it will take time. patience I have this old friend from back in my hometown we use to be friends with benefits until I met my current bf but me and my bf we are not intimate he is pretty much dead from the waist down so I pretty much been deprived of that for a long time. I went back to my hometown about a month ago hung out with guy friend we did have sex I came back home to bf and told him what I did he was mad of course and made comments but didn't throw me out a couple of weeks later I was on the verge of leaving had my stuff all packed but my bf stopped me said really you're gonna end this after 5 years just like that he sounded like he didn't wanna lose me. He said you just gotta make the effort everything can be different. Like he doesn't take me out much and we don't have sex He feels more like a relative to me now. He really cares and supports me But I mean the fact that I cheated on him I'm sure we can work it out but it's not just about that I mean for as long as I stay with him I'm gonna be deprived and this isn't just about sex it's about knowing that I'm 28 and feeling like I don't know about all the stuff I might miss out on fun excitement if I stay with him and he is photographer but also makes money tying up a photographing nude women on the. side like it's for money it's how we eat but yea still bugs me. My friend with benefits does not love me but he supposedly will let me live there take care of me so I can get better. But there's drawbacks to him like he's in a shitty small ghetto town where everyone knows everyone and also he's got a kid about 13 so those are the drawbacks of being with him I guess I'm wondering what you guys do If you we're me?


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What Guys Said 0

No guys shared opinions.

What Girls Said 2

  • You should do what you think is best for you. We can tell you whether to stay with guy 1 or guy 2, but ultimately the decision is yours. You aren't happy with your current boyfriend who loves you but can't satisfy you sexually. And you won't be happy with the friends with benefits, who will be able to sexually satisfy you but not emotionally.

    So it seems that right now you should base your decision on whether it benefits you more to stay with one or the other.

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  • You seem to think an awful lot about what you can get from a man and you're comparing the two by how they can provide for you. You're not the only person on Earth with social anxiety and your view on relationships and men is deplorable.

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    • I agree you're right And I do not think I'm the only one I recently went to a social anxiety group I finally got the courage to go it was hard but I did it and now I'm taking baby steps. To move forward I'm glad I got to talk to others maybe they can relate and feel better. And I need to change my beliefs I'm still unsure but just need to make decision and hope for the best. Thanks for you're comment.

    • Honestly, you sound like you should be alone for a while, and not with a guy. It'll make for a healthier and more sustainable relationship in the future. Good luck.

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