I've been on three dates with this guy and he has not ONCE paid. We always split, which is okay sometimes I guess, but I really feel like he is more of a friend right now. He doesn't flirt with me much, we've kissed once and I feel like I'm not really romantically interested in him anymore. I don't know. I just feel like it's odd that we're "dating" and he hasn't once paid, offered to pay or even talked about paying for a bill with me. I have a feeling he thinks it's more forward thinking and feminist... but something about it makes me feel like we are just two friends.
Is it weird he NEVER pays on a date? It's always 50/50?
What Guys Said 17
Why should he pay? I could understand 50 years ago when men worked and women didn't, but why do people still expect a man to pay. I have NO PROBLEM being a gentleman at all, I will open your door for you, do all that stuff if you really want but when I work 40+ hours a week I don't see why I should have to spend my excess money on her when she spends her excess money on herself as well.
Unfortunately, society has standards that are expected to be followed and while the movement for women's rights is still going on, no one cares at all about EQUALITY.5
what make you think he should pay for a date for you? what does he owe you? Ok lets say he does for a date for you? then you decide to run off and your not interested in him anymore. He has gained nothing by paying for that date.
You go on dates, to find out about each other, have fun, and to see if you both like each other. Dates are not to be take seriously, its more about having fun and finding things in common.
Sorry young lady, if you are looking for love, then don't go round expecting men to be paying for and running round after you like a little princess, he is not your daddy. Thats something would expect from your dad. You girls , can get good and better jobs, earn the same just as much men now.
Stop acting like your entitled to everything from a man, thats not love. You are dating him, cause you like him as person, and not for what he can give you material wise. If you want nice things, then buy those things yourself.5
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You girls always talk about gender equality and you find it weird that you always split the bill?
Have you ever considered that MAYBE that guys does not have enough cash to pay the whole thing?
And why don't you feel "romantically interested" anymore?
You feel he is not into you because he does not pay for your dinner? Come on !!!
You sound like shallow girl dating guys just to get free food and a free ride9
You are expecting him to pay based on your understanding of social conventions, so when he does not pay you see it in more of a friend context because that is probably what you do when you go out with friends.
That said, it's not fair to simply expect him to pay whenever you are at a restaurant any more than it is fair for him to expect you to make him sandwiches any time you are at home. My PERSONAL rule is that whoever does the asking does the paying, at least unless the other objects. So if I ask her somewhere, I pay for it. If she asks me somewhere, I expect her to pay. in my opinion it's just a matter of courtesy and doing something nice for someone, not fulfilling societal expectations. It's the same way I look at holding the door for people. If she never does anything in return (e. g., ask me out somewhere and offer to pay), I'll feel like she is just expecting me to do everything in the relationship and I'm not cool with that.1
that's BULLSHIT... what means the guy must pay? this is too old-fashioned i say!!! be serious!! everybody pays his/her OWN. fair and square!0
Dump him and get a sugardaddy instead3
No it's not. Why should he have to pay for you?5
Why should the guy be the one to pay? Splitting is always good that ur independent and not always dependent. If u nvr helped to pay, i'd dump u for ur selfishness >.>1
Never expect that he pays for you!3
it's not about the money. it's about the connection between you both and the depth in it is not there.0
Nope not weird. Why do you feel it's not weird for you to have not paid for a full date?1
This reminds me of the whole "Make me a sandwich" thing with genders reversed xD0
Girlz should be the one who have to pay0
In b4 hateongolddiggers1
"He is treating me like an equal and not an entitled princess.. OH NO !!!"
Funny how you're romantically interested in him anymore if he doesn't fork cash in your general direction.
Did you ever loved him for who he was or his money?5
What Girls Said 15
It's definitely not weird. I wish my boyfriend would do this with me. I have to force him. I prefer a relationship that's as 50/50 as possible. We both cook for each other, both clean for each other, we both work, we both pay. We take turns though. Sometimes he pays for a date, sometimes I do. Sometimes we do split it 50/50.
He says he'd prefer if only he paid for dates, because he's the guy and it feels weird for him to let me pay. But I like to pay also because we both ate, both watched the movie, both enjoy each other's company.
So you are lucky in my opinion, I would love to not have to beg or convince my boyfriend to let me. In the end he does. So no, not weird in my opinion.0
If a guy really likes a girl then usually he'll want to impress her and want to pay I know that's the expectation but in this day and age it's understandable for him to not want to pay and even though most guys still do it doesn't mean they all do and just because he doesn't pay for you doesn't mean he doesn't like you that could just be the way he is and the way he sees things don't pay much attention to it because I really don't think you should worry about it if you like him then just keep going for it1
On a first date the man should ALWAYS pay, if is a gentleman! I don't expect him to pay everytime but I set my standard at that as a minimum! Don't waste time on losers that are cheap or don't know how to treat a lady!
Ps. This doesn't mean I'm a gold digger! It means I like a man who opens the door for me, gives me his coat if I'm cold ect... Men these days have lost the ability to, for a lack of a better word, woo a woman! Yes I want to be treated like a princess! And yes, in return I will treat my man like a prince!2
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As long as it isn't one person always paying, I don't see the problem. It's a little unconventional to not simply just... switch picking up the entire tab.
But, not a dealbreaker.1
I don't think he should have to pay for you everytime. If he asked you on the date the first time, then he probably should pay, however if it was a "let's meet up" kind of thing, you should pay for your own food. Have you asked him about it? He might have a legitimate reason why he splits the bill with you. If it's this bad to you, why are you still "dating" him?0
Find one that will, my boyfriend mostly pays for dates when I do he feels like his manhood is being taken away. I just let him pay. It's all in what u want, I feel a man should pay. I was raised in a traditional environment and so was my boyfriend plus we were both raised Muslim enough said. I have never paid for first dates or second but I find men with my views and who usually ask me out.0
yes for me it would be weird. at least he should offer to pay once especially on official first day0
From the way you described the relationship you sound more like friends.0
being cheap with money on the first date is a turn off. definitely.0
If by weird you mean fair, then yes.0
If he is a student or unemployed i would understand but if he has a job then weird0
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