Should I ask him about our relatioinship or wait it out?

I've been 'talking' to this man (25) since May, at first it started out really nice - he would text everyday any chance he could. I say that because he's in the Air Force, so his time isn't really typical & that's the frustration. In June we went out on our first official date and it went well, we ended our night with a kiss and that was that. Unfortunately he got really busy with work so I wasn't able to see him again until July. I went over to his house and we watched movies/cuddled and then eventually we ended up having sex. Again, he got busy with work (he flies to a country every other week) and so I didn't see him again until August. I went over, we went out and then we had sex. If this was a different guy, I would believe that this arrangement would be considered a bootycall... but since he's always so busy he tries to see me when he can. And as of now, we hardly text. He only texts when he wants to hangout which is every other week. We haven't exactly talked about what we want in a relationship, we just keep repeating this cycle. I want things between to become deeper but I don't know how to say it... but I feel like if I do I might appear clingy or something. How should I approach this topic? Or should I just wait for him to say something?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • The easiest way is to hang out with him next time, and not have sex. See how he reacts. Is he upset or is he fine? Does he contact you again after this or drop you altogether? A guy who really likes you and wants something real isn't going to freak out over not having sex one time that you're together. Also, he'd be texting more like he was if things were still going as strong. Backing off for a period of time is normal. Backing off completely now that you're having sex is not.

    I believe this is more of a bootycall relationship. It doesn't have to be, it's on your terms and what you choose, but that's the arrangement right now. Basically, he doesn't feel the need to step it up if he doesn't feel you expect it.

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What Guys Said 1

  • A man is most honest right after sex. Talk to him right after you have sex to get the truth out of him concerning the relationship or you can vmw2008's advice which is solid.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Honestly, I think u should ask him. This will clarify things for you two. Like this at least you will know what u r in, and may continue with ur life if it's not the right thing. If you just wait out, you might end up wasting time and then get the answer u dont like. Clarify things now!
    Hope that helped!

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  • Simply just say " I want things between us to become deeper "

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