Meeting the girlfriends 11 year old daughter for the first time?

Ok so I've been dating an amazing lady, it's going really well. I couldn't be more in to her. I've not dated anyone with kids before and I don't have kids either so I'm pretty nervous about meeting her. Despite that I am excited too, we talk about her all the time and I can't help but ask about her. So I could do with some help... What are the rules here... Do's and don'ts etc


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Most Helpful Girl

  • respect her boundaries, ask about her interests, engage in her interests, try to find some common ground between you two because thatll help bring you two closer. but dont be too pushy. maybe ask a few questions, if you get the vibe that she doesn't want to talk so much (whether its her personality or just because your her moms new man or something) respect that and back off a bit. Let her come to you.

    I've experienced this many times, including when i met my step dad for the first time and all of his kids and family. plus new editions to other family members from marriage. it may take time but thats okay

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    • thanks for MH!

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    • Thanks, not feeling quite so nervous about it now. Sounds like your quite wise for your years. Big help

    • yeah as long as you respect her boundaries since this a big deal for both of you, you should be fine. im glad i could help!

What Girls Said 7

  • I have a 3 year old from my ex husband, so. I know a little about this. First and most importantly be yourself! The mom obviously likes you a lot for who you are so most probably the daughter will too! So don't pretend to be someone you not. Second, be very friendly and show that you have interest in her life, like ask her questions and act like you care. And try to show her who you are. Maybe find a common interest. Third, don't do much pda in front of her and do not curse but you probably know that. But it being the first time, she may or may not warm up to you immediately, it may take a few times. So don't worry about it too much. I hope it goes great for you and that you have a good time. =)

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  • Wellll... One thing for sure... Don't be pushy or try to throw yourself on her. What I mean is that don't try too too too tooooo hard to get her to like you. Don't be fake. Just be yourself, be respectful and try not to be too affectionate with your girlfriend in front of her because it'll make her feel awkward.

    Sources: My parents are divorced and I've met their significant others so I know what it's like.

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  • Just be yourself don't ask her too many question you both need to warm up to each other I would not recommend getting her a gift though she may like you for it that is a bad way to start and try to win someone over she should get to know you for you. It is really important that over time she sees that you make her mother happy and you treat her well.

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  • Don't: EVER RAISE YOUR HAND AT THE KID. Don't make her cry. Don't make sexual jokes with her. Don't touch her inapropreatly. Don't look down her shirt. Don't be a creep.
    Do: ask about her hobbies, boyfriend, things she enjoys, favorite foods, classes, etc.

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  • You be yourself and everything will be. Okay ask her questions get to know her don't be fake

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  • get her a toy or a gift or something

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  • She's 11, she ain't gonna like you whatever you do. Just be yourself.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I've been dating a 24 yo single mother with a 7 yo daughter, we kissed, were intimate , spended evenings together, when we dated in July, her daugther was already back in poland for the holiday. she talked about her daughter, that we had to take it slow, showed me pictures of her daughter as a baby. i thought wow, great, she is about to let me meet the most important person in her life, and well, things couldnt have gone any better. so she went to poland as well, for 18 days, sending me pictures from her daughter, her and her daughter , directly the moment she got there, i thought she is really into me. well the longer she was away,. the more quiet she grew. i was really looking forward to meet her kid, and to see her again. the day she came back, she did send me a small message, i thought wow she is telling me when she is about to arrive home, but no, the message stated, that we can't be together. there was no indication, or what so ever, that could have prepared me for that notification. it hurted me a lot, and it still does, i was really into her. she never gave me a reason to why all out of the blue, writes me this, as it is today, she banned me from her Facebook and whats app. we still see each other at our work, and there she acts like i did her wrong. My advise to you, i had been thinking about 18 days, what to do, i bought some bord games, that kids from her age like, in case she would let me meet her child. you know what, im stuck with all the emotions, the stuff I've bought, and the idea, that i was sincere about taking care of her daughter, if things worked out fine. now im nowhere, nothing, sad, angry. dont look forward to meeting her child, let it happen, because single mothers can just turn their minds within an instance and that really hurts a lot. GL mate, i hope you will get any further then i did, because i think me and this girl aren't going anywhere soon, if at all. i hope things get fine but she hardly speaks about her emotions and herself!

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  • Well one of my dating rules are: I don't date women with children.

    Note: I don't have any children of my own either.

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