First of all I don't care. I'm not with him for the money I love him for him. He gets very angry at me whenever I offer to pay for dinner or something because he says he's not poor even though he is at college with no job and he only has a single mom that gets money from the government. I come from a rich family and I think that makes him angry but I can't help where I come from :(
I dont know how to approach this, I told him I didn't mean anthing bad by it but he gets so angry whenever something like wealth comes up in conversation. He is a perfect boyfriend aside from this what do I do?
Most Helpful Guy
Backstory can be everything. I grew up in a family of four, living on about 11-14,000 a year, too "proud" to resort to aid or food stamps, etc, with something like 40,000 in high-interest debt.
I've been comfortably on my own, with savings, for over 6 years, my family has "bootstrapped" themselves into the lower middle class.
But, I still am so intensely sensitive about being given things, especially food. It makes no sense, and it's to the point where people think I am offended by them, somehow, at times.
The other day, a coworker brought me small gift, and I suddenly got all quiet, and flighty, and kept changing the subject, and managed to avoid ever accepting the gift. I think I hurt his feelings quite a bit, and even at the time I knew I was being a prat. But it's a hard habit to break.
I think it's one of those things, if you didn't grow up with food being something that was a real, day to day concern, you probably won't ever get. I mean, hearing your mom say "I'm really sorry kids, but we can't afford fruit this week, it's rice and beans and potatoes again" for the nth week running, is not really the same as, no, you can't go to that party. It's an emotional, frightening thing, for a kid, and it can last into adulthood, even when it shouldn't.
To put it in perspective.
I come from a pretty poor area in a pretty poor state, but one of my friends growing up was firmly middle class. His dad was a town manager, and he got things like an x-box, or a new bike for birthdays and christmas, etc. A lot of the other kids gave him shit about it, "rich kid," "spoiled" etc. And he was, true, but he was and is a really, really nice person. One day he just cracked, and jumped up in the middle of the high school cafeteria screaming.
Wealth and Poverty. The key is communication.
Talk to him about it!1