What's your deal breaker?

If you like someone and you're pursuing them, what's something they could do that would make you change your mind entirely about wanting to be with them? (And don't say obvious ones like them sleeping with someone else).


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Fair question, but there is more than one and I guess this applies to most if not all guys and girls in general.

    Respect.
    First and foremost, mutual respect is the pillar of any bond. A relationship demands certain understanding and respect from both the ends. Without mutual respect, there can be no relationship.

    Flirting.
    Yes, you mentioned you are pursueing this girl, but knowing that your girl is enjoying another man’s company more than you is just disturbing. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with healthy flirting. But when she starts overdoing it, it simply means she has lost all interest in you. A one-sided relationship cannot drag on for too long.

    With me or...
    Does she look past you when you meet? While it is perfectly fine for her life to not revolve solely around you, it is appalling when she doesn’t even acknowledge your presence. If she is not paying any attention to you, especially when in public, it’s time to get the hint, mate.

    Trust...
    Lying is an indication of a hole widening. Petty lies are totally okay, we use them as excuses too sometimes. But the real problem arises when it borders on to bigger things. They may not affect you at present, but chances are that it may soon revolve around a lot in the relationship.

    Constant Critisms.
    Disagreement is one thing, nasty criticism is another. There is nobody in the world who is entitled to belittle you. A lot of women develop the habit of looking down upon their men, critiquing everything they do, and definitely not in the right spirit. Criticism is supposed to help you evolve. If she cannot accept your flaws, or at least try to help solve it together, there is no reason why she should have any importance in your life.

    Those are just a few common reasons but all of which are justifiable. I hope this helps :)

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What Guys Said 12

  • Being the other person when you know the guy is cheating on a girl with you and you know, continue the relationship, and you don't care. It's a little different, but it says something about character.

    Talking behind someone's back in a nasty way. A few months later, I was with a group of friends she happened to be in, this same girl had another best friend who she'd gush over, and the second the friend was gone, she'd call this "friend" a "fat, disgusting whore" - I also dated another girl who did this, so I know it happens, but this was one of many reasons we broke up. Saying "it's a girl thing" doesn't excuse it for me.

    Being CONSTANTLY late with no calls to say you'll be late. Especially if you're always at LEAST 10-15 minutes late. It's a deal breaker.

    She flits away money. I'm not wealthy, so I try to save it. I'm not stingy, but I try to stay good with money.

    Being a drug user; any kind of thing like that. A criminal, she's mafia, etc... I can't date.

    I suppose being a former (self proclaimed) slut... I can't sleep with someone who'd jump into bed with a guy before 3 months and dated a new guy every six months since the age of 16.

    Someone who refuses to give up things that would affect my health. I dated a girl who would eat something I was allergic too right before our dates; I'd get sick from kissing her. She'd eat this food ON DATES; I'd warn her.

    Treating waitstaff badly.

    Constantly changing what "WE" are going to do. For example, just deciding WE'RE going vegan because it's on her whim... without any listening to me or allowing me to make decisions for myself. If it doesn't affect your health, then what's wrong with me eating a burger? Now, I get if I was a smoker, and she was allergic, ok. That affects her. Otherwise, talk to me about it first at least.

    These are the big ones.

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  • If a girl feels the need to talk shit all the time. Definite deal breaker.

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  • Member of kkk

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  • If she's BI or if she's a drug user or has a record a mile long. many things

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  • If some how I discover she's racist. If it's a situation where I'm looking for a potential long term/wife material kind of woman then her not ever wanting kids would kill it.

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  • Unambitious, unintelligent, unhygienic, no sense of humour.

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  • Not performing oral sex. That would be a deal breaker.

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  • A woman who's really judgmental.

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  • Being really into the more extreme form of feminism that acts like women are nothing more than victims. I don't want to be with a woman that thinks guys are running around waging war on women. I want a woman with a healthy outlook towards men.

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  • Not necessarily the rule but if she has kids that's a concern for me. Another thing is if she uses guys to get things.

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  • Experienced, kissed, had a boyfriend

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  • Being rude to waiters, bartenders, etc. That shit pisses me off.

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What Girls Said 4

  • If they don't want kids.
    Thankfully my boyfriend loves kids and wants to have them as well.

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  • If he's lazy, negative, bipolar (dealt with that before, never again)

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  • -Extremely promiscuous past
    -Religious
    -Has kids

    Of course all 3 of those usually don't go together...

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    • Oh and racism, thinking he's better than others, materialism, nasty eating habits (Taco Bell for dinner every other day) smoking, bad hygiene

  • Smoker, drinker, substance abuser. Atheist. Two or more kids (Especially by more than one individual). Sexist. Racist. Shorter than me.

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    • Ohhh and if his sexual orientation is anything other than heterosexual.

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