Has anyone else noticed that gender roles have changed? :) More details in my question?

Guys and girls seem to be swapping roles lately? Like it used to be that girls texted guys all the time and were clingy, but now guys try to get a girl to open up more and express her feelings? How did this shift take place? I feel like girls are becoming more detached in relationships whereas guys are interested in establishing something serious all of a sudden :) What do you guys and girls think about this?

Thanks in advance <3


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I have noticed this as well. I think this is what feminism wants, to reverse gender roles and not eliminate them. That is why boys are being taught to be weak, and girls are being taught to be strong.

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    • I think you might be right about that :) I was just wondering because a lot of my friends seem to be wearing the pants in the relationship, lol :P Thanks for your input and opinion :)

What Guys Said 7

  • I don't think it has to do with a gender role shift, actually.

    Power in dating and relationships usually goes to whoever is less into it. A girl that's head over heels for a guy (who's not really interested) is going to be clingy and trying to vie for his attention. A guy that's really into a girl (that's just waiting for a better guy to come along) is going to be working harder to get her to favor him.

    Personally, I think the shift has come about as a result of poor economy and greater female independence. Dating, especially at a young age, seems to be less and less about "would this person make a good partner?", and more about "is this person exciting/attractive?" As such, you have fewer serious relationships in college, and a lot more drunken hookups. For the people that want something serious, that tends to cause issues.

    With women having such a huge role in college and careers, a lot of women feel no need to find a great guy early on, since they don't need a guy for financial security. Not to say that women having financial independence is a bad thing, but when attractiveness and spontaneity take precedence over responsibility and reliability, a lot of decent guys get left in the cold. As such, they end up trying to work harder to please the women they date (which, ironically, tends to have the opposite effect).

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    • This, actually. When women and men are pushed into long term relationships only, their desires sort of match up and they pair off. When hooking up is an option, women stop being attracted to guys for being decent stable 'men', and want guys who are fun, exciting and hot. That's a small number of guys, who hook up with tons of girls, casually, and the girls try to compete for them by being less clingy and more relaxed about casual sex. Meanwhile the ignored guys want a relationship even more, since they have no access to girls otherwise.

  • What I've noticed is how everything is judged on text. "He didn't answer my text right away!" "I always have to text her first!" 'How come they never read my text"

    Text text text. People are forgetting we're human beings.

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    • I see what you mean :) We've suddenly become a technological universe, lol :) I was just giving an example of what I was trying to say though. Thanks for your input!

  • This is the effect of gender neutrality. But guys seem to be more into the typical romanticism than girls. If anything, the only "romantic" thing I have seen girls expect is not having to do a thing and still being asked out, haha.

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    • IMHO, men have always been the more romantic ones, but women -appreciated- romanticism for what it represented. But women nowadays are more likely to interpret romanticism as being desperate.

    • @kheserthorpe that is awfully disappointing, though. :P

    • Well, I think that in a lot of traditional cultures, men were assumed (and still are) to be the powerful ones. Consequently, their kindness and romance was always seen as coming from a position of strength, not needyness. That's no longer true. Essentially women like romance when it's not necessary, and dislike it otherwise.

  • I didn't know who texted first was a defined gender role.

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    • That wasn't my point, lol :) I simply meant that guys seem to be bringing more to the table emotionally than they have in the past. That's usually what girls contribute to relationships as far as I know. Thanks for your input!! :)

  • I have no clue of why relationship roles switched. It's pretty pathetic and just... Weird to have the male be the weak and submissive and female to be strong and dominant. I feel like it's a wrong choice in my opinion

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  • Feminism

    But actually you're talking about the guys who are still interested in girls. Many guys can't be bothered at all anymore

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  • To further what anonymous said about feminist wanting to flip gender roles. I think that is true. They want to be the ones in charge. Make men weak and women strong, therefore, women are in charge and can dominate the weak men. Not equality, but female superiority.

    However, I wouldn't say that the roles are reversing. Not from my own personal experience, anyways. I was over at a friends house and his mom was texting his dad... After a couple of minutes she calls him asking him why hasn't he responded to her text message... she then said, "I sent the message like a whole 6 minutes ago, why haven't you responded?" Now, as for why it takes him time to respond... He's a driver for a shopping market. He's the one that picks up and drops off all the new items. He can't be focused on texting while on the road.. but she cared more about him responding back in 6 minutes than his safety.

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    • I guess it depends on who you're around :) I know that the people in my life have pulled back from being clingy because they've come to realize that guys can use this to their advantage :) I think women are taking the comfortable backseat in relationships like guys have continued to do for years at a time :P :) It seems that when the girl pulls back the guy fills the role of caring & sharing his thoughts/feelings. Thanks for your input & feedback! :) Much appreciated!

    • I do agree that it's probably who you're around, but I think it's more of where you live. I live in an area of 36,000 people. And there's about a total of 59 churches in this area. So, chances are... the majority of people in my area are going to be more conservative than liberal. haha.

What Girls Said 2

  • Wherever these guys are that want a serious commitment, direct me to them. All I've encountered is guys that wanna play games. Direct me to a guy that wants to settle down. Most young people want to fuck around. I don't have time for that shit, so please send those guys that want something serious my way.

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    • Yeah, I know what you mean :) You just have to search around until you meet a sweet/reliable guy :) Luckily I'm with someone like that at the moment & I really hope you find someone special too :) I'll be sure to pit in a good word for you, lol :P

  • I think it has a lot to do with culture also. I am very traditional because I was brought up that way. I do all of the cooking, cleaning, serve my man before myself, don't argue, etc. I need for my man to be a man. If I was able to "push him around" it would be a huge turn off

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