My girlfriend told me her teacher sexually harasses her?

The other night my girlfriend came over and she just seemed off. Eventually she told that her teacher has been sexually harassing her and touching her inappropriately. She obviously didn't enjoy it, because when she told me she kept crying and apologizing. Eventually she left after I calmed her down but I'm fucking furious. She said she doesn't want me to tell anyone because she's afraid it will ruin her grades, but what am I supposed to do. If she hadn't asked me to not say anything I would have kicked his ass by now! I just want to kill him! But I can't! Anyways if she doesn't want to me tell (and I can't kill him obviously), them what can I do. I don't want to just leave her with him, because who knows what he'll try to do. But I need to do something. Just how do I help her?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sexual harassment is really serious, especially in a learning environment when a teacher you're supposed to trust is the one harassing you, and obviously your girlfriend is extremely distressed by it.

    Firstly, I just want to say that I'm really pleased that you're not even entertaining the thought that maybe she did something to bring this on herself and I have to stress that the most important thing for you to do is support her and let her know that you're totally on her side and that you don't blame her at all. Your support in this is going to mean a lot to her.

    Secondly, I think you're right about being concerned about what he might try next. Obviously your girlfriend doesn't want any of this to harm her grades by letting anyone know that she's told you, so I think it's probably best to avoid doing anything that can be traced back directly to her/to you.

    If I was in your position, I'd go to the counselor/nurse/whoever managed student relations in your school/university. There's usually someone who you can take any problems with other students or members of staff to in the building. If you can't think of who it is then I suggest asking at reception and asking to make an appointment to see them.

    When you see them, then the first thing you should do is ask that this remain confidential and anonymous. That's important to your girlfriend and it should be important to you too - but you have to balance that out with her safety, which is obviously the most important aspect in this.

    You could ask that if this is dealt with, it simply be made known that a fellow student has seen the inappropriate advances this teacher makes on his students and were concerned about it. He's likely doing this to more girls than just your girlfriend, so the chances are that this can't be linked back to her and even if it can, he still has no way of knowing who brought the issue to the school.

    If you need any more advice then feel free to ask or message me <3

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What Girls Said 11

  • You need to say something regardless of how she feels about the situation now, if you don't say something there's no telling what will happen to her in the future it's better to stop the problem then let it keep going on. You're protecting her and one day she'll understand and thank you for it.

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  • Just be there for her, try to convince her to say something, but don't push her. Mostly, just be there for her.

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  • You have to tell somebody. Sexual harassment is a serious issue and needs to be taken seriously. This sleazebag needs to be punished for what he is doing and should be fired. Tell your girlfriend that she needs to tell somebody, it's the right thing to do and her grades have absolutely nothing to do with it. Comfort her as much as you can and ask her what else you can do for her, she will appreciate you being there for her. Hope this helped!!

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  • Get a camera or tape record it then you'll havd proof then get him done. He'll get fired for sure but make sure its didcreet.

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  • It may not be just her grades it may also be she's simply just terrified of him if you find out the teacher and also see if he's done this to other girls it will be easier to convinct him

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  • TELL SOMEONE!!! He could try to do something so much more!!! Tell her parents, or the teacher himself, if he tries to lower her grade tell the administration and then he will be as good as dead and you would have hardly gotten your hands dirty

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  • She has to tell someone! This is not on :( She needs to tell someone ASAP

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  • Is she in high school or college?

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    • She needs to report him

  • Dude you need someone asap. Tell her parents or if u feel too weird tell like one of her siblings and they could tell her parents.
    You can't let this keep going. The longer it happened a the more things will happend and worse it will get. This can scar her and really mess with her head in the future. Regardless if how are feels now if u tell someone the sexual abuse will stop and she will be thankful then.

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  • Is there a way your gf could talk to a therapist or a school counselor about this?
    And/or your gf should drop out of this teacher's class and get a different teacher teaching the same class subject.

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  • So... If you report it, there will be an investigation. Nothing can really be done unless she is willing to come forward.

    Comfort her and don't push her to come forward, but definitely want her to come forward.

    Also don't do anything stupid that will end up on your record. I understand your mad, but don't ruin your life and potentially make the situation more hard on your girlfriend.

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What Guys Said 1

  • find out the teacher. and report him he will be in jail faster than you can say pedophile. seriously its your job to help her make sure he gets punished one way... or another

    i do not take any responsibility for any injuries he gets

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