How can you find out if a guy you meet at a bar or night club wants more then just sex?

How can you find out if a guy you meet at a bar or night club wants more then just sex? I have dated someone that i met at a party, but thats over a year now, and all the other guys i have met while going out just wanted sex.
I have met guys at clubs and they have aksed for my number, but i never hear from them. And yes i know its a very bad place to meet guys, but where im from its not reallyh that normal to walk up to girls or guys on the street, or at a cafe etc. Its more exeptable to meet them when your at club/bar etc, or school/work. And since i dont go to school and that everyone at my workplace are women in the ages 30+ and dont see how i can meet someone there.
So if i met a guy and we talked for a while, and he didn't ask for my number or facebook, does that automatically mean he only wants sex/he just want mer or that night, or can it mean other things? for exemple if i have to ask for his number or Facebook etc, does that mean he doesn't want to know me/hang out or whatever or could it be because he dont know if i like him or not?
My best friend started talking to a guy at a club, and she had to take control most of the time, but he would say things like "oh you need to show me around " etc. So she meet him 3 days later for coffee (she had to ask him), and she had to start the converstaions most of the time later on, on snapchat or facebook. Later that week she offered to drive him home, so they went to his place, and they made out. But he still didn't start comverstaions, text, send snap or anything and he never asked of they could hang out, even when she put the ball in his court. So he seemed intrested, but at the same time not. And by the way she was the on to ask him for his Facebook at the club.

So any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You don't give up sex right away, that's how. I would say to simply ask the guys if they're looking for more but obviously lies exist for a reason. By abstaining from intercourse you're telling the guy "I'm not looking for meaningless sex, so you're not going to get it". If they keep contact with you for more than a week that's probably a good sign.

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    • Okay, is it really that easy? :) I dont have sex with people anyways, but sometimes i do make out with them at the club. And should i talk to several guys in one night or should i just take one at time?

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    • Well I'll be honest, I myself don't think I'm the most qualified to answer those questions as I'm a pretty shy guy and would never set foot in either venue. BUT, what I can assume is that most guys in a club are fairly confident and their goal is in fact to get a woman (guys aren't going to clubs to fist pump for 3 hours to bad music and exotic lights... they're trying to get laid). Point being that if they wanted to be with you on a more personal level they'd be able to ask for your info and contact you later.

    • And about the multiple guy thing, I'd say to keep your options open but wouldn't suggest making out with several guys in a span of a week.

What Guys Said 3

  • Try to pay more attention to the less flashy guys. The ones who are not all the riot and chock full of confidence. You might find they can have more substance and be interested in something more serious. You might find that the shy introvert in the corner or that intelectual guy acting all cold might actually be interesting, humorous and kind people once you get them to warm up and feel more comfortable.

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    • I have thought about approaching the shy guys in the corner... but i can be very shy myself, so i feel like its never going to end well, because he is shy, and im also shy

  • Bars and clubs really isn't the place to meet guys, but others hav gave some good advice, don't have sex and see what happens

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  • dont meet him at a bar XD

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't have sex and see if they keep contacting you.

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