I'm in love with a taken guy! What should I do?

I got to know this guy and he made it pretty clear he's in a relationship. I'm single and I didn't think anything at first except that I enjoyed hanging out with him and we had lots of fun. Now things have changed. He said to me I'm everything he has ever dreamed of, and I feel the same way. However he says he can't leave his long-term girlfriend right now so he's asking me to be patient and us to figure out how things are going between us. Somehow this feels really wrong and I'm afraid he's gonna choose his girlfriend over me eventually. But I have never met anyone like him and I'm so happy with him! What should I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • The way I see this, sweetie is, he is having his sweet cake and eating it too. He is telling you 'Sweet' Somethings then Nothings in your ear, stringing you along with his song because he Probably Does find you 'Everything he has ever dreamed of.' However, for he is taken and most likely as well will Never leave her, will End up doing what he Feels will satisfy his hunger and make his own dreams come True----Cheat on her with you. I am seeing the signs and it doesn't have to be etched in stone to see what is going on here. And with 'Cheating' on her, he is Cheating you as well... Just like he is dancing to the tune to you now.
    I know I could talk to you until I am blue in the face, but I feel your heart, feel your elation and with this, can 'Feel' you are wearing your poor vulnerable heart on your sleeve. I also Feel that when the music stops, he is going end up ripping it off and breaking it in two, staying with the One half Only, and Not The True Blue one which is You.
    You deserve better... I am not here to hurt you, I care enough because I don't want to see you get hurt.
    Good luck, God bless. xx

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    • I'm telling you... the soul of Tupac is strong with this one. ;) jkjk Your opinions are always very well written and they always ring true.

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    • You are so welcome, sweetie, I am here for you to help, never hurt... It's like a mistress who is waiting in the wings for a married man and says I will divorce her, but never does, has his cake then too and eating and cheating you both... xxoo

    • God is the only one who judges, and believe me, He will Judge this one because if it isn't You, it will be another sweetheart on the side.

What Guys Said 4

  • Keep your distance until he leaves the other girl, or she dumps him for being insincere.
    Your feelings are correct that this is wrong.
    If he wanted you, he would dump her TODAY , so he could be with you.
    There is no middle ground.
    I did what he is doing once, and it was not right to either girl.

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  • Him: The grass is always greener on the other side.
    You: Once a cheat always a cheat.

    He's keeping his options open. If he cheats on her he will cheat on you. Watch out for this one.

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    • Thanks, I guess you are right... as sad as it is.

  • Thats slack to his girlfriend if you take him. I hope she's ok.

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  • If he leaves her, for you, what makes you think he won't leave you for someone else. He's a player

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    • THat's a good question... i've been thinking about that. I guess I should forget him...

    • Of course

What Girls Said 3

  • It feels really wrong, because it is really wrong. He is trying to set it up so he has her as his GF and you on the side. Something like that will never work, he has already demonstrated to you that he will cheat. He is cheating right now, maybe he hasn't physically cheated yet, but it is in his mind and he will if given the chance. If he somehow left her would you, could you trust him? The answer to that one is pretty clear.

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  • Don't date a guy that fickle.

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  • I've been in that situation before and I have only one thing to tell you: go away from him. I know how hard it is to let go but you must do it if you don't want to get hurt really bad. Even if he breaks up with her to be with you, that won't work out, trust me. The only scenario where you could think of getting involved with this guy is if he breaks up with her on his own will, because he's not happy with her and no one else is in the picture. Still, he would only be ready to date again a long time after the break up. I hope this helps you, if you still get involved with him, I hope you learn from it.

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    • Thank you! I guess you're absolutely right... I just didn't want to accept that. I'm guessing I should stop this now.

    • In my case, the guy eventually left his girlfriend to be with me. Things were great for about two weeks, after that it went downhill. When you break up with someone, you need alone time to heal and let go, which he never had. I couldn't stand having him by my side thinking of her (even talking of her too). So I broke up with him, he's back with her now. These guys are after the thrill of flirting with someone new because they're a bit bored with their long term relationship. But they don't actually want to leave her.. Whatever you do, be careful, but yes, you should stop it now. There's plenty of free guys out there :) Good luck :)

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