Why is he still with me but he's not happy?

The past month or so my bf and I have been fighting. I moved in with him shortly after we started dating. Which is why I think we fight quite a bit. It feels like we are married. We have been dating for a little over a year. I have trust issues due to past relationships. Which I know I shouldn't drag that into ours. But sometimes it makes me wonder if I should trust him. He can be a jerk but he gets that from his father. It just runs in the family. And lately he doesn't show that he loves me thay much. He use to ask to cuddle if I wasn't already but now I have to. For about a month he didn't want to have sex. Because he was to tired from work he said. We have been doing it a little more now. I have asked if he has ever cheated on me and he said no and thay he would never. Then last night we were arguing and he said he's not happy with me because we fight all the time. Then I asked him why he's with me and he said because he holes someday I will grow up. Which means start trusting him. But I still don't know why he would be with me if he's not happy? Also would this be a reason he would cheat on me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • When you invest so much of your time on something, its real hard to let go even though you may not be satisfied with it. He hopes you change because he still loves you. He just doesn’t like the fights involved.
    I know this is kinda personal but what kinda stuff you guys fight about? I mean if its like simple shit, washing dishes, laundry, forgetting to do certain chores around the house, then its not worth it.
    If it’s like sketchy stuff like he’s out all night and doesn’t tell you where he is kind garbage, then that’s a good enough reason to doubt and question his motives. In a relationship you must be responsible to commit and completely open your life to your partner. There must be no lies or eventually one of you will deteriorate and move on.

    You must compromise for each other or you’ll never make it through the first year of marriage. Do things for each other for the love that’s in each other’s hearts. Not because you have to, but because you want to, to make him or her happy.

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    • He barely ever goes out. Usually if we do its together. Sometimes he goes with his brother but it's just to the neighbors. His phone has died a couple times which makes me mad because I like to know when he is gonna be home n if he will be home for supper. Other things we fight about is mainly my trust issues. Also how he doesn't really show that he loves me. Which I guess he was the same way with his ex. He is just thay way I guess. But I wish he was more romantic. We fight evernight basically because he never talks about it so I keep bringing it up because it bugs me.

    • Asking a man to be more romantic is like (excuse the vulgar-ish analogy) asking him to get harder when he already has a hard on. Either its in him or its not. You also need to give him some motivation or maybe show him some ways to express his romance differently. This is the man you chose to be with, find yourself some reason why you’re with him. Maybe you’ll start to appreciate being with him more when you find the reasons to be valuable enough.

What Guys Said 2

  • This would be your chance to start trusting him. He's being extremely patient with you for whatever reason.

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  • Sometimes it's better than being alone.

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What Girls Said 3

  • He means he is not happy with fighting with you all the time, you should stop taking everything he says in a negative way. If you want this relationship to work, you have to stop otherwise he will leave you. He comes home to you expecting you to come and show him love but instead you fight with him. If this continues then he might as well leave you. Think about it. Do you want this to work, if so then stop doing those stupid stuff.

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  • Because he is probably one of those people that needs to be in a relationship

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    • He dated his ex for 5 years and was single for about 5 months after he broke up with her and that's when we started dating. Plus if he didn't want to be with me he said he would break up with me and his mom even said thay if he didn't want to be with me he wouldnt. Cuz me and her were talking one time and I asked her that because I was. worried he didn't wanna be with me.

  • You should leave bc this will eventually lead to more harm than good.

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