Falling in to deep depression?

I am falling in to a deep depression I have a hard time meeting women I I am 37 over weight ugly very shy and not very smart when I talk to a woman and get shot down I run and hide for days I am not going to work out as I truly hate working out sports or that crap. how ever there thing I like to do


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It seems like you are in such a cycle that you're comfortable. Get out of your comfort zone! You have to put yourself out there. If you say you don't like your appearance, try a different hair cut or change your facial hair. As for the weight, you should lose some weight anyway. Here's some tips to it: cut out soda (and yes diet drinks count as soda), cut out snack cakes or items full of sugar (have them to treat yourself), start walking (listen to music, walk around with a friend). Those things will cut weight fast. Then you'll get up your self confidence! Everyone is beautiful and ugly in someone's eyes. Hell, I think my friends boyfriend who is 45 is ugly, but my friend who is 30 loves him! It's about confidence. In order to meet new people, you have to do new things. Community colleges usually have self help classes (pottery, art) etc, and they're usually $40-65 for a class that's 6-8 weeks and you meet once a week. You'll get to learn a new hobby, and make new friends. Start volunteering in your community or outside your community (cultural arts center, baseball, anything). You have to get out of your shell and out of that cycle.

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What Girls Said 2

  • If you're not willing to put in the time and effort to change yourself so that you feel proud of yourself than how do you expect anything to get better or change? If you know you're over weight and you feel like you're ugly than you're gonna have to suck it up and change it! Otherwise, be content who you are and where you are in life if you're not willing to do much about it and try to make the best of things as they currently are.

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  • You love to eat. Why not get into one of those programs that you eat food to lose weight? Better than nothing. You're not that bad looking if you lose the weight.

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    • I have tried ever thing to lose it I want to lose I hate working out I have to do it I don't know how to make my self do it when I don't want to do it

    • It's either that, Or surgery ( which is more expensive).
      I used to say the same, but working out makes me feel better after wards. It's a life style change, meaning you'll have to do it over and over again for years. Don't you want to live longer for your family?

What Guys Said 5

  • Dude. You have to have confidence in yourself. You are not ugly and shyness can be overcome. By only speaking on subjects you know, you can make yourself appear smarter. Another thing to do is to research topics of interest. Movies, music, food, these are all good topics to start conversations about.

    Ugly is subjective. Over weight guys can get girls. Look at John Gabrus. He is overweight but has confidence. You have to see yourself as good looking and have the fashion sense to back it up. If you see yourself as good looking, then you will build confidence in yourself and that confidence is what attracts women.

    Shyness is only overcome but pushing through it. There is no fix for it, there are no shortcuts. You have to face it and bull through it. A lot of guys are nervous when talking to woman they find attractive. They know how to bull through it and you will find that the shyness lessens as you talk more and more.

    This is just from my limited scope on the world. Take care of yourself and good luck to you.

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  • "I am not going to work out as I truly hate working out "

    That's too bad. Working out would help not only your weight, but also your depression. It would be a great boost of confidence. I hate working out too, and I've been doing it for 5 years. But I like the results.

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  • The situation is not that bad. two things you need to do immediately:-

    1) Seek professional help.
    2) Work out like a machine to reduce weight.

    After you've done these, you'll notice the massive change in your confidence. Good luck! :)

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  • I'm in deep depression too. I'm not fat though, just offputting looking. I hate how I look and the fact that girls ignore me. It's the worst feeling ever. Hang in there buddy, I know how hard it is.

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  • well you have been with a woman before since you have kids so I find it hard to believe that you would be shy and have difficulty with women

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    • i only been with 3 women my whole life my slat relationship ended 8 years ago

    • typically a man who has been with that many women before would know how to get a woman already

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