Guy problems help.. I am so stuck on 2 guys its not even funny.. which guy would you choose?

I have it bad for 2 guys. But its driving me crazy on what to do.

1) joey. he's funny and sweet just amazing.. Says the sweetest things. But we never see eachother. Really bad anxiety and depression. If I don't text him back for awhile he flips out and anxietg kicks in but he's never threatened me.

2) tyler. he's really sweet. We have a lot in commom. he's understanding but he sometimes gets rough with me and I can't stand his family. He's also my neighbor. He can get really mean too.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You need to drop them both and this is why:
    You can't be in a co-dependent relationship where the guy is freaking out when you aren't able to answer, I can promise you that he's going to be either controlling or jealous, possibly both. It'll be emotionally draining and no one is happy in that kind of relationship. He might be a wonderful person but he needs to work on himself.

    As for the second guy. It doesn't matter how sweet he is now, if he is physically or mentally abusive you need to get out. Don't ever begin something with someone like that, trust me, it can and probably will end badly. I cannot stress that enough. It doesn't matter how sweet he is and how much you think he is going to change, how he won't do it again... Just get out now.

    These two guys have something in common which is that neither one of them are anywhere near ready to be in a stable relationship because they aren't stable. If I'm going on a limb here, it seems like you are drawn to people that need help? Thing is that you can't help these guys. In these cases the only thing you can do is to walk away, they have to want to change for themselves.
    My advice is to walk away now, let them both work on themselves and maybe one day, if you haven't found a guy already, one of them are ready for a healthy, loving relationship.

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    • Thanks. That helps alot. Once tylee bent my arm backwards and it hurt. I don't know if it was on purpose tho.

What Guys Said 6

  • feel which direction your heart is leaning towards and fall with it.

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    • That's my problem I am not really sure. :/

  • How about choice #3: Drop them both.

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  • Both have big negatives:

    1) 'Anxiety and Depression' + 'flips out and anxiety kicks in' == Not good BF material
    2) 'Rough' + 'Can't stand his family' + 'Neighbour' + 'really mean' == Not good BF material

    Option 3 neither, both are not good choices as boyfriends.

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    • Thank you. That helped quite a bit. Kinda put things in perspective

    • No worries :) glad it helped somewhat :)

  • I speak for all Tyler's just joking. But if he's freaking out (Joey) about you not texting him back that's a lack of time management and confidence. but the mean guy might be something bold and refreshing (Like Doritos). This is almost text book what i'm reading here. If he's really mean and turns abusive then call it quits but I feel like you might be exaggerating his mean behavior for flirting quote me if i'm wrong.

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    • When I say he can be mean. He was playing with me and he bent my arm completly backwards it felt like it was breaking I said ow and he didn't stop.

  • Know guy should be rough to a girl, no matter what. I'd say Joey although he sounds a little twisted and twisted people are hard to predict. Maybe you can wait to find someone better than Joey or Tyler.

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    • I really like them both. I feel so protected by joey.

  • How long have you known each of these guys?

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    • Joey since like 6th grade and tyler two years

    • Well, only time will tell. You could keep seeing them both and maybe you might discover you like one more than the other. I've been involved in a similar situation before with 2 different women. It didn't turn out well though. I couldn't choose between the two and eventually I had to leave the situation altogether. It's really difficult and stressful to make two commitments, not to mention unfair to the ones you are involved with.

    • Well thank you. Its a very tough situation. I am not seeing eithee of them but I am trying to figure which ine I should go with. Not easy what so ever.

What Girls Said 1

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