Girls, why do you cancel shortly before a first date?

I don't date a lot but this is very common. Usually about 1-2hrs before the date i'll get a text with some bs excuse about why she can't go. It's anything from my back hurts to I'm becoming a shemale. One time I got pissed that I spent 3hrs of my evening waiting to see if she could actually go on a date and I was like fuck no I didn't just waste 3hrs doing nothing and I was able to convince her to go out and basically told her I didn't care that she wasn't going to be in her best state. Makes me wonder if I need to do that with every girl since maybe they are just trying to see if the guy really wants them. This happened again today, but honestly things just seemed a little weird with this girl and I wasn't in the mood to try to convince her.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I've done this ONCE... cancelled really last minute and i felt really bitchy about it. This guy was just quite persistent but he was really nice and I didn't want to flat out reject him, so I ended up saying yes. I should have just said no straight away though because I realised that i REALLY didn't want to meet him and made up some bull shit excuse to get out of it, the day of the date which was a meaner thing to do as opposed to just refusing initially.

    That was just me, I don't know how often this applies though


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What Girls Said 4

  • Hmm, that sucks. Wonder why they agreed in the first place. I've been on quite a few dates, and rarely had to cancel/reschedule. I'm usually pretty excited for it.

    • My guy friends do the same thing. Except with them most of the time I'm halfway to their house before they cancel. So I basically don't have many friends or maybe I never really had true friends in the first place. This is usually why I just work a bunch so I always have a shitload of money to spend on myself. It usually keeps me happy enough.

    • Seems you've run into a bunch of flaky people. Money's always good, but I hope you find friends/dates who are more consistent and hold some value in keeping their word. That would bug the hell out of me if my friends canceled on plans all the time.

  • That's odd. Being a girl, I can admit that some girls can be mean and crazy. However, I advise not to give up! Not EVERY girl is a total bitch, even though it may seem like it at times. But if a girl really has an emergency and cancels, you know she's being truthful if she wants to change your date to another day. At least that's what I'd do! I would feel terrible canceling so I would make an attempt to meet up another time. And if girls don't make that attempt, they're not worth your time!

  • Who knows why some PEOPLE do that. Cancelling last minute is not a gender related issue.

  • Anxiety. Reluctance. Regret. Actually the excuse they say. Just not feeling in the mood.

    • I usually feel the same way, but you never know. It could end up being a waste of time or you could end up meeting your future husband/wife. Sometimes I even say to myself I can't believe I setup a date on this date, but I always follow through. I don't just cancel at the last second.

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    • This girl made it sound like she had a long day at work and just didn't want to go. Honestly that's not a good reason especially when we both live in the same city and we can both make it to the date location in 10 minutes. Oh well. I was actually kind of excited that I didn't have to drive 45 minutes which is usually the case.

    • Try giving the benefit of doubt.

What Guys Said 1

  • This JUST happened to me while I was driving to her place which was 1 hr away. FEELS TERRIBLE BRAH.

    This girl was really anxious about whether I ACTUALLY FANCIED HER, but when it came to the time to actually commit and meet she went into an ILLOGICAL state of mind for no reason, even though my actions said 1000 words.

    Notes to take away: Girls are ILLOGICAL. As revenge get as many as you can into bed with you, pump and dump ' em straight after, it's what I'll do for sure.

    • I've never understood why guys do this but I'm beginning to now. Since it seems that girls are so flaky and there is a 95 percent chance that any kind of serious relationship will ever come out of it. I can see why guys just bang girls when they can and don't think anything of it.

    • I would have just shown up anyways by the way if you're already on your way. How's that for fancying