I met this girl on the train the other night. She is stunning, but also very nice. I didn't really focus on her looks just that she was a cool person to talk to. I've seen her before but never talked to her. She was looking at me from afar so I went over to her, boarded with her, and started talking to her. We joked around a bit. She told me about her. She told me her name (it was loud and I butchered hearing what I interpreted).
Her stop was coming up, and I said she seemed cool and wanted to get her number. I gave her my phone, she put it in, said it was nice to meet me and looked forward to hearing from me. I gave her a call and then she called me back. We talked for a bit, joked, and said I wanted to say it was nice to meet her, wished her a goodnight and asked if she wants to go out sometime? She said that would be great. I asked her schedule for the week and I think we might get something figured out... or early next week (I was saying I had to get some stuff done).
So question: Should I try to get a date with her Friday night even if it might be tough for me? Or should for early next week?
Drink at a trendy bar good?
I looked her up on FB and she is gorgeous. I never really focused on her looks when I was talking to her just that she was a cool person. But man, I feel like I'm a bit out of my league here!
Most Helpful Guy
First thing to do is just "accept" that she's interested in you, and "appreciate" her for not playing games and seeking validation from you that you want her and like her and find her attractive, etc.
Second thing to do is to acknowledge that she's attractive, and then get over it.
Third, don't let her looks throw you off. She's a human being in a female body. She has the same normal behaviors other similarly situated people have in her circumstances. Just try to get to know her, rather than trying to get something from her, and see if she's even someone you like.
Definitely don't "pretend" she's someone you like just to have sex with her. Not only is that not fair to her, it's also not fair to you! It's really not. You're going to ruin your reputation, you're going to ruin how you feel about yourself (in the long-run), and you're going to ruin the chance to at least see if you ever really were interested in her as a complete person. She's "accepted" you as a dating partner... that's all the sexual validation you should need. If she didn't think you were up to par with the value she brought to the table, she wouldn't waste her time with you.
Attractive girls are like guys with a good job or good income, there's no shortage of "good" options for them. Not just "options," but options "they actually want." So, they don't have patience to tolerate BS here and there, or to give someone "a chance." They don't have the same "need" to compromise or settle.
So, if she's with you, it's because she likes something about you, even if it's as simple as you making her feel more attractive. Look, I'm no 10, I would say I'm an 8 in the looks department (when naked or without a suit to distort or create bias in any opinion). But, when a 9 or 10 wants some of this, it's not because it's a 1:1 exchange on my looks. I'm giving her the feeling of "feeling like she's better-looking" which makes her feel "safe and secure" in the relationship.1
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