At 40... I have my first 'real' boyfriend. Am I doing this right?

I got married at 17, pregnant, in highschool to someone I barely knew. Sadly, we despised each other for 20 years, until we finally divorced, just in time for the kids to fly the coop. I took a few years off, to find myself... then joined Match. com. On that site, nearly a year ago, I met, what seems to be, my soulmate... just a few miles down the road. I am very inexperienced in the numerous facets of a relationship... I don't want to get very descriptive, but, lemme tell ya... I have had more firsts in the past year, than I ever had with my ex... Sex with him was a form of punishment... now, its for enjoyment. My new BF, 'Alex', has been married twice, been to strip clubs, nudist resorts, and I am sure, with numerous women. Don't get me wrong, he tells me almost every day... this is 'forever', and from what his family tells me, they have NEVER seen him this happy. I have transformed his home, am helping raise his child, and enjoy every second with this man. I TRULY LOVE HIM. My issue? I am SOOO insecure. Although I am 6 foot tall, blonde, great figure, and considered attractive, I find myself feeling insufficient. EVERY single morning, he trolls on Chive, pausing and grunting with every single half naked woman he sees, while my head lays on his chest. He also gets aroused and pleasures himself, while I lay next to him. I have NEVER witnessed a man do that, I am as inexperienced as they come. He wanted to throw a bachelor party for his brother at a strip club a couple months back, and when he sensed that I was VERRRY uncomfortable with it, he backed away, as NONE of they guys and their wives supported it either. I just feel so inadequate... our sex life is AMAZING... but I feel like I am competing with the numerous people in his past, and on the Chive. I have been with VERRRY few people... I never even had oral sex! I don't think there's advice I can get that will help me, as I really just have an insecurity issue... I just wish he was as sheltered as I was..

Updates:
Its primarily after I arouse him, but he usually trolls chive before or after... I just hate that damn app!

0|0
1|2

Most Helpful Guy

  • He really likes his sex. That's okay.

    Picking naked chicks on the internet over you, especially when you're right there, is not.

    I don't think you can change him, though.

    1|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 1

  • "EVERY single morning, he trolls on Chive, pausing and grunting with every single half naked woman he sees, while my head lays on his chest. He also gets aroused and pleasures himself, while I lay next to him."

    What an asshole! You're inexperienced, but not stupid. Get out!

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 1

  • He pleasures himself for another women in chive while your laying right next to him? This is not normal..

    1|0
    0|0
    • Its primarily after I arouse him, but he usually trolls chive before or after... I just hate that damn app

    • If thats when then why is he on an app instead of paying attention to you? Make sure you tell him that you don't like it and if he cares about making you feel good then he may stop. Try new rings with him since you don't have much experience. Everything has a first time but never force yourself into it, if you don't want it.

Loading...