Why do you assume girls who can't guys are fat?

Any time I asked a question asking why guys don't like me on here the first thing people say is, "lose weight" or "be happy with yourself", when I never once mention anything about my weight or say anything about insecurities. Yes I am overweight but I am happy with myself and if that is the only reason that a guy wouldn't want to date a girl then that is extremely shallow. If guys don't want girls to like them based off of looks then they should really open their eyes and realize that they do it. I have never once liked a guy based on looks, I always become friends with them and over time they become more attractive. If I can look past things why can't others. Maybe instead of assuming a girl is ugly, or fat, or insecure guys should like girls for their personalities and not give them ignorant advice on here.

Updates:
That wasn't my question at all. I didn't say why do guys not like fat girls? I said why do guys assume girls who haven't been in a relationship are fat? I know there are some grammar mistakes but that doesn't change the fact that you guys can't read

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Most Helpful Guy

  • While "personality" is important, so is physical attraction. You can't deny that it plays some sort of a role in your attraction to someone. Many guys are not a fan of overweight girls but some are. I couldn't be with an overweight girl and many guys say the same thing. "Chubby chasers" are not as common.

    When a guy tries to be sexual with a girl he's not physically attracted to he doesn't get the passion and such and it's like there's a wall there preventing him from getting into the moment. Plus if it's an attractive guy with an unattractive girl, don't think that he may not feel like a "piece of meat" like many girls feel when they're hit on by creeps. A lot of girls claim to be attracted to "personality" but watch them in front of an attractive guy and you'll see it's all a buncha generic statements these girls are using to justify how they are just unattractive to most guys.

    Obesity and such are major problems in the US and it's constantly getting worse and worse. This definitely has an impact on dating as well.

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What Guys Said 6

  • One, you gotta understand that for men, we need to be physically attracted first. It's not us being dicks, its how we see attractiveness just as you needing to be friends is necessary. As for the assumption, its the same reason why some women don't pursue very very attractive guys because they fear they are already taken based solely on thar fact. As a guy, a natural conclusion is that if a woman which is seeking a man isn't able to find one, some flaw or characteristic is likely holding her back. This conclusion is due tothe dissonance regarding male vs female dating. If a woman truly wants to date a man, she could get a guy with little effort. Whether that guy is one she cares about dating is another story entirely. Going back to what men seek, in this scenario, if men could have those kinds of odds, they would never have a problem finding a woman since physical attraction, at least initially, is most important. Therefore, a guys view of a chronically single woman suggests that despite the odds being stacked in her favor to date A MAN (though not particularly the one she may want), a natrual conclusion for a man is that the woman has some major flaw because to a man, that is often how we see our inability to win the dating game. Ergo, if you can't find a man, there must be something wrong. We search our own experience and desirable traits for a woman and conclude what would make us think a woman was unattractive and whalla, it must be her weight which is an example that satisfies our dissonance issues and answers the question, at least in the man's mind, of why she is single.

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    • Yeah I stopped reading that when you said a woman could get a man with little effort. If that is true then I must be a man because I have been rejected more times in the last two years than I could count on my fingers. I have never had a boyfriend. I have never kissed anyone. I have never been calls attractive by someone. So no it isn't "easy" to be in a relationship because I am a female

    • Then you missed my point ;) many women can get a guy with little effort but very very rarely is it someone they want. Its that creeper or the weird guy or any number of guys whom the woman would find undesirable but the fact still remains that she could.

      I am merely commenting on the statistically higher occurrence of women being hit on than men. Creepers count in that number regardless of how much a woman wouldn't want to date them.

  • Attraction is both emotional and physical. A relationship without any sexual attraction can't possibly work.

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  • Guys take personality for long term relationships and looks for short term. And basically all guys are looking for short term relationships and expect them to pan out from there. There are guys who like chubby munchkins. And I've heard its hard to try different positions on fat girls. Guys who are oriented on sex, go directly for looks. Which mostly all are. Its not like 100% guys hate fat girls. Its just that no of guys who like fat girls is low. Besides that It's just another social health problem, just like drinking, smoking etc. There are girls who don't like guys who drink/smoke. Girls are more romantic than boys, they only care about how he makes them feel, Boys are predominantly sexual. And they go behind what their eyes love. Do not rate boys from a view of a girl. It's entirely different.

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  • Sorry just not into fat and bad grammar all rolled up into one.

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    • Actually usually I'm a grammar Nazi on here xD
      I was just so irritated that I forgot to proof read

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    • Omg xD

    • :P
      .,.,.,

  • I like chasing chubby darling *Blushes*

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  • It depends on what type of overweight, love and relationships will need at least some sexual attraction, or at least that's how it starts.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Personality is important and should be the number one priority when considering dating someone, but it's totally unrealistic to think that physical appearance doesn't matter at all, or that it shouldn't. A person should be physically attracted to someone they're in a romantic relationship with. Of course it's different if it's someone you've been in a relationship with for years. It's wrong to dump someone because they've gotten older or less attractive. But I'm talking about when you're looking for someone to date.

    If a guy doesn't like thick, or chubby, or overweight girls, it makes no sense for him to date a girl who looks like that (same applies to girl not liking overweight guys). She can have the best personality in the world, like I said, if he simply doesn't like that body type then that's that. Humans are naturally attracted to what they consider beautiful, whether it's a certain type of flower or a certain style of painting or another person. Don't criticize a guy, or girl, because he or she doesn't find what you look like attractive. That's unreasonable. That goes for anyone.

    As for weight, people automatically assume overweight people are insecure, because being overweight is not typically considered aesthetically ideal.

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  • Many chubby gals don't have trouble meeting chubby guys to date.

    People list apperance and insecurity because those are two common factors in dating troubles. Also looking at who you're trying to date more carefully, social skills and, my personal fatal flaw, actually going somewhere to meet people. Cheers!

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