Should I be worried about my guy doing this?

So, I was laying in bed cuddling with my guy and he kept texting. I ignored it at first but when I looked up I seen a females name. I simply asked who is that. He said just a friend.

I didn't say anything else after that but its not the first time I've seen her name on his phone..
We aren't exactly exclusive yet but he always says if I'm going to be I'm going to choose you or that he doesn't talk to other girls...

Should I continue to worry about this because he has been acting a tad shady lately? I don't understand why men hurt good girls if something is up! I'm trying to just trust him but its kinda hard to now days.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Hey, I'm a single guy with a fair few females as good friends of mine who i either went to school with, or have met outside in the real world, and most of those girls have boyfriends, which, as a respectful guy, i keep the chats to a friendly minimum, and don't make anything out of wink emoticons or playful text, as i don't want to interfere with their relationship... and the reason i chat to these girls is, is because we all either have a common interest, a common sense of humour and understand eachother or we truly just stay close because we have a great bond as friends... another way to look at it is, think of your parents... they have friends, wives/girlfriends generally are the ones who text eachother to organise things, but all in all, it's nothing to be worried about, the only thing you should be worried about is if he tries to hide the screen when you look, or he tries to organise a catch up "just as friends" with her...

    and just one more thing, even when i've been talking to a girl im crushing on or crazy about.. or even early stages or late stages of a relationship of which i've had 3... talking to girls can be just keeping them company or giving them someone to talk to... it's not all about sexting, hookups and love... sometimes a friend in need, goes further than that, to a solid friendship :)

    Goodluck xx

    • I understand that completely that's why I've never invaded his privacy. However, recently someone called him and he always answers his phone around me but that time he looked at it said I'll call them back later and said it was some guy then placed his phone face down. I didn't think anything of it until the next day... He kissed me goodbye when he left for work. Then didn't talk to me all day even though o text him about my day and how his has been. Still nothing

      Well then the next day I was getting frustared so I get a bit of an attitude and he finally answered really late that night saying how he's going through withdraws from quitting drugs and stuff and in a. weird world. That he feels like a piece of shit... I don't get what he meant by that. Well we got into a fight and haven't talked for a few days now... So now I'm worried maybe he found someone else.

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    • OK I'll send ya something in the AM! Its almost 2am I'm beat

    • thats okay! im from australia haha, 4.40pm here, sweet dreams x


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What Guys Said 6

  • Guys and girls can RARELY be just friends. However, you need to make your relationship official if you want to have the power to set the rules. Actually, if you are official, there may be no reason to "make rules" because it's official, and he'll simply do what normal people do in a relationship... and not text/talk to other girls. If you are cuddling in bed... it should be official anyhow.
    The fact that this even concerns you means that it's time to move forward with the relationship or move on. Is this the guy you want to be with? Tell him. Maybe that's what HE is looking for... someone to make it "official" with. Get on with it! Good luck.

    • Its been weeks and he still won't make it official. He said he isn't ready for a relationship but I don't think it's fair to me to act like a boyfriend then say that...

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    • I can message you trust me there is so much more to this story and I feel like I'm just to stupid to open my eyes and see it

    • Feel free to message me, I'd be happy to offer my opinion on the "rest of the story"... just remember, it's only one opinion and not necessarily fact. However, I'm happy to share if it offers any help. Message when you have a chance.

  • Women train men. You see that he has the upper hand in your relationship and you can do little about it. If you are giving him sex and affection and then permitting him to text anyone while he is with you, you are the one rewarding bad behavior.

    Women are too easy.

    • I don't want to be controlling though... Like I can't just be like oh I see you're playing the field
      I think he cares about me or else I doubt he'd spent the money he does on me... But I don't he just seems off lately.

      He's told me before I could go through his phone but I declined.

  • "If I'm going to be, I'm going to choose you"

    This means you are closest to gf, but he's still banging other girls.

  • tell him it should be official, if you want him to stop set up rules for you both and see if he breaks them

  • He is a player. Don't cuddle with someone playing the field.

  • Dump him he ll still do it regardless


What Girls Said 1

  • I am very close with a guy and I have been for a few years, and his girlfriends always freak out when they discover him texting me or making plans with me.
    Most male-female friendships are harmless... if they mutually liked each other, then he wouldn't be with you.

    • See like I states previously I'm okay with it if he's up front. However he's had some shaddy behavior lately. I don't say anything to him about it because I don't want to be controlling but I notice

    • Maybe you're being paranoid and he isn't acting shady? What has he done that is shady?