What should I do? I'm confused?

I was dating this guy who lives 4 hours away. We broke up because he said he doesn't trust the distance because he was hurt when he did a long distance relationship before. He said he doesn't want to lose me so I told him we can be friends. He said he's in love with me and wants to be with me but he can't because of the distance. He then said he wants to talk to someone else until we are able to be together. When we get together he'll leave them. I didn't agree on that so he said okay he won't do it. So last week I found out from him that he kissed and had sex with some other girl. No we are not dating but I'm so in love with him and he tells me he loves me and he led me on for almost 6 months now and when he told me I was so hurt. I still am. Our relationship happened unexpectedly and I'm just so confused at this. He told me he doesn't know what to do because he likes me and this other girl who is his sister's best friend. He talks to me about everything and he barely talks to her. He said it's that she's there with him nd I can't be right now. He told me we we're going to have a future, kids, share a place when I go there for college and etc. So now I'm still talking to him but as best friends because I don't know what else to do.. i want to be with him more than a friend nd he says he feel the same way but now he likes me nd another girl. I'm so hurt and cried and he keeps apologizing and saying he doesn't know why he did what he did but he loves me and know I hate him right now. What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds to me like he is weak and needs to be close to someone or he will look elsewhere. This is not unusual but is not good for a faithful relationship.
    You either accept that the guy can't be faithful unless you are close and looking after his every need, or you find a faithful man, closer to where you are.
    It is the same with women, if they have need of intimacy and their partner is not close or paying attention, they may look elsewhere. This is wrong but in many cases is the reality.
    Personally I do not agree with people being unfaithful and trust is important to me, but to avoid this situation we must understand that being close to people is a strong influence on people. You have to be with your partner and fulfil what they need or things go wrong.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I side with the anonymous guy...4hrs isn't that long for someone you have professed to love. I drove 5 hours to go see a friend. He is jerking you around. you need to nip this now. LD relationships don't tend to survive, but they can.. its rare but it can. You don't mind waiting but he does... and he will keep on kissing and having sex with other people. you have two options...
    1) let him get his physical touch from others while you wait (risky)
    2) explain to him that 4 hours is not that long for him to come see you maybe once a week... and move on. (more sensible)

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  • Rule #2: Long distance relationships don't work. Now you see why. It's nothing but drama and confusion.

    Just dump him and move on.

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  • my girlfriend live in usa and im in india but we are happy , soon we will meet ,, distance is doesn't matter love is the thread which bonding us with our heart ,,,,,,,,,, my story is little similar like u but we love each other, i had never kiss and have sex with another girl.. i just love my girl friend and i respect her and her feelings,. you should leave him bcz he is not for u he is not trust-able guy he lies you , he played games with you.
    Don't waste your time for him, forget him, i know its not easy but i hope u can. soon u will find a guy who will respect your feelings who will care your feelings and never broke your heart,.. .. bye takecare

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  • 4hrs isn't really much distance. If 4hrs stops him from being with you and motivates him to "cheat" on you I think you need move on. Don't waste your love time and tears when there might be a guy near by that won't "cheat" on you And love you as much if not more. Long Distance relationships are a bad idea (speaking from experience and not from what I've heard) anyone can tell you they love you from miles away only few can prove it while infront of you. Again DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME TEARS AND LOVE life is short to waste for someome who says they love you and sleeps with someone else save yourself from more unnecessary heartache. You can't fix a broken heart and broken trust with I'm sorries.

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